


Better Than Dead

by heartsdesire456



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Accidental Mate Bond, Future Fic, M/M, Mates, Sexual Content, Werewolf Stiles Stilinski
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-08
Updated: 2013-08-08
Packaged: 2017-12-22 18:39:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 27,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/916661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartsdesire456/pseuds/heartsdesire456
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Stiles is gravely injured, the only way to save him is for Derek to turn him. However, Derek never did learn exactly what certain bites meant and, without this knowledge, he accidentally claims Stiles as his mate. Alpha werewolves mate forever. However...</p>
<p>Betas don't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Better Than Dead

**Author's Note:**

> So, this fic ended up longer and less interesting than I wanted, BUT I still like it and I hope you guys do too!

For all the times Stiles thought he was going to die from all of the werewolf stuff, when it finally came, when the life was slipping out of him as time ticked down, he was actually surprised. 

It was meant to have just been reconnaissance, checking out a warehouse with suspicious activity, nothing more. Stiles had gone inside with Peter while Scott and Derek circled the outside. None of them suspected to actually run into the witches who were thought to be doing rituals in the long-abandoned shipping warehouse. Within seconds the witches had descended, trapping Peter in some strange purple circle of fire before one turned on Stiles and stabbed him in the abdomen with a cursed dagger. The blade itself had missed most everything vital, but the poison on it started coursing through his veins like _fire_. With the first scream of agony Stiles let out, the witches all fled, only for the doors to be fly open as Derek and Scott ran inside. Stiles was too busy _dying_ to see the fight, but from the sounds of it, Derek and Scott ripped the coven of four apart violently.

By the time Stiles began to stop feeling the pain so badly, Peter was free and rushed to his side. “Derek, come quick!” he shouted, kneeling beside Stiles.

“Stiles!” Scott ran to Stiles, sliding to the floor across from Peter. “Oh God,” he breathed, putting a hand over the bleeding wound. “We have to get him to the hospital-“

“There’s no time,” Peter said, looking up as Derek got to them. “You have to bite him, he’s dying.”

Derek knelt behind Stiles’s head and looked down. He paled when he heard Stiles’s heart struggling. “An ambulance won’t make it,” he breathed and Scott’s head snapped up.

“What?!” He looked at Stiles, who was shaking, eyes flickering everywhere but at them. “Stiles? Stiles?!” Scott looked up frantically. “Derek, you have to bite him!”

Derek shook his head faintly. “I- I can’t,” he breathed and Scott growled.

“Why not?! He’s _Stiles_! He saved your life-“

“It’s not I don’t want to, Scott,” Derek snapped. “He doesn’t want it,” he said, looking down at Stiles. “He- he never wanted it. I won’t- I won’t do that to him-“

“Derek, he’ll die,” Peter reminded him. “He does want it. He denies it but it’s there-“

“You sound like a rapist, damn it!” Derek snarled at him. “He doesn’t _want_ the bite!”

Scott shook Stiles, patting his face. “Stiles! Stiles Derek needs to bite you. You’ll die!”

Stiles was lucid. He had been the whole time. It just hurt _so much_ so speaking wasn’t something he wanted to try. He felt the numbness spreading and he just wanted the pain to stop. He wanted to _sleep_. He knew he was dying without Scott’s words, but he almost didn’t care. He could see it every time he blinked. He could imagine seeing his mother again. He would be with her again and he wouldn’t hurt anymore – physically or otherwise – ever again. No more illnesses. No more injuries. No more fear gripping him every day. It was such an enticing thought.

“Stiles, _please_ ,” Scott choked out, tears in his eyes. “Please, consent. C’mon, I know you can hear me! Don’t die, not you too,” he cried, leaning down to press his head to Stiles’s chest, listening to his heart as if it was the last time he’d ever get a chance.

Stiles was flooded with a suddenly horrible feeling. He thought about Scott. Scott without Stiles. Scott on his own. With nobody that knew him to the core the way Stiles did. Nobody would share the memories of almost all of Scott’s life leading up to sixteen. And his dad. His dad would be _alone_. His dad wouldn’t have anything. He’d drink himself to death within a month. He’d never survive having lost both his wife and his son. Stiles thought about the pack. Derek without Stiles to help him get the information he needed to be a good leader. Stiles suspected he was the only person who could get Derek to talk about anything serious, so Derek would be all alone again. Stiles couldn’t leave Scott. He couldn’t abandon his father. He couldn’t let Derek lose another person whose death he could blame on himself. 

As the edges of his vision blurred and began to shift, Stiles shakily nodded, looking up at Derek. “D-Do it,” he breathed, and Derek didn’t hesitate. 

Scott scrabbled to pull Stiles’s shirt up from his hip, but Derek thoughtlessly tugged Stiles into his arms, back to chest, and pulled his shirt to the side, wasting no time to sink his teeth into the junction of Stiles’s neck and shoulder. Stiles cried out weakly, but then slumped, eyes rolling back as he went limp in Derek’s arms. 

As Stiles slipped into unconsciousness, he prayed he would survive the bite. His pack and his dad needed him.

~

Derek carried Stiles when they got back to the house where Isaac was waiting with Lydia and Allison. The second they came inside and Isaac smelled all of the blood, he flew to his feet, startling Lydia and Allison as he cried out, “STILES!” and ran.

“Stiles?! What’s wrong with him!” Allison and Lydia both rushed after Isaac, only to stop behind him in the archway as they watched Derek walk through the door after Peter, Stiles’s limp, blood soaked body in his arms. Scott’s eyes were red as he followed them in and shut the door. “Is- is he-“

Isaac swallowed. “He’s been bit,” he said, then he and the girls stepped aside, letting Derek carry Stiles through to the living room. Derek laid him on the couch, hoping the blood didn’t get into the leather from Stiles’s shirt.

“You bit him?” Lydia demanded of Derek, and he just glared up at her. “Why?!”

“He was dying,” Scott said weakly, slumping against Isaac, who wrapped him up in a hug. “He- he was dying.”

Peter leaned against the wall and cleared his throat. “He still might.”

Derek looked up and shook his head. “No, he’s already healing.” He carefully ripped Stiles’s shirt open, exposing his healed over stab wound. “He’ll be one of us now.”

Peter hummed. “Well then, I guess congratulations are in order,” he said, smirking at Derek. “Didn’t know you and Stiles were at that stage,” he said, and Derek frowned.

“What are you talking about?” he asked, and Lydia gasped.

“DEREK AND STILES?!” she screeched, then glared at the others. “Nobody told me that!” She huffed. “I’ve still been trying to get Danny to date Stiles!”

Derek glared over his shoulder. “There is nothing to tell,” he defended and Peter rolled his eyes.

“Oh my God, don’t tell me you just allowed that instinct when you haven’t even grew a pair and _told him_!” Derek and the others stared and Peter huffed. “Oh God, how stupid can you be?” Derek looked affronted and Peter walked over, leaning over the couch to pull Stiles’s shirt down, exposing the bite.

Lydia gasped. “Oh my God.” She slapped a hand over her mouth and the others all turned. She rolled her eyes. “Does nobody do their research?! That’s a mate bite!”

Derek jerked around, eyes wide. “A _what_?!”

Lydia just gaped at him. “Oh my God you _are_ stupid!” She gestured to Isaac and Scott. “You bit them both on the hip, right?” He nodded. “What about anybody else you’ve ever bit?”

Derek frowned. “Hip, but what does it matter? I wasn’t beside his hip, I was beside his head-“

“It was an _instinct_ ,” Peter interrupted. “You chose to bite him there, Derek. Or apparently your wolf did,” he said flatly.

Lydia nodded. “Bites to the shoulder like that only happen in self-defense or in a mate bonding.” She smirked. “It’s on the shoulder right there because it’s supposed to be done during the consummation of the marriage-“

“WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME THIS?!” Derek cried angrily, cheeks flushed with rage. “Nobody thought this was important?!”

Peter gave a sarcastic little laugh. “Most people assume their alpha knows _why_ he bites people where he does.”

Derek growled. “And you know I wasn’t groomed to be an alpha, I was never supposed to be one, I just had it happen.” Derek looked down at Stiles, eyes wide. “God, what did I do?”

Peter smirked. “Mazel Tov! You’re werewolf married!” he leaned on the back of the couch and smirked. “And for an alpha, mating is for _life_.”

~

After Isaac set to cleaning Stiles up and getting his bloody clothes off of him so he could rest, Derek dragged Peter into the kitchen and shoved him through the door. “Why didn’t you _stop me_?!” he demanded and Peter scoffed.

“With what time? You were biting him before I could react!” He shrugged. “And I couldn’t have stopped you. That was your instinct, even if you haven’t faced up to it, you chose him a long time ago,” he said pointedly. “Do you think nobody has ever noticed your interactions with Stiles?” 

“I didn’t know what I was doing!” Derek argued. “Whatever anybody thinks they see, the fact stands that I didn’t know what I was doing and he’s eighteen!”

Peter shrugged, crossing his arms. “Lucky for him, he isn’t the one stuck,” Peter explained. “The _alpha_ mates for life,” he stressed. “You picked him. At least your wolf did. Your baser side recognized that Stiles is a good mate for you. The wolf knew Stiles is what you want and need. You could’ve bit his hip, but you didn’t even think about it, right?” Derek shook his head. “Because your wolf had decided for you that Stiles is _yours_ and death wasn’t going to take him from you.” Peter sighed, rolling his eyes at his nephew’s dramatic expression of horror. “Look, he’s not trapped if that’s what you fear. He’s a beta now, so he’s no more bound by a mate claim than a human mate of an alpha would be.” 

“So he could still get away from this?” Derek asked, looking hopeful. “I don’t want to _make_ anybody do anything they don’t want-“

“Good, because you won’t be able to boss him around,” Peter said, and Derek raised an eyebrow. Peter smirked. “The alpha’s mate is mostly immune to an alpha’s control. Nobody knows why, but the general leading theory is that the alpha’s mate is meant to help the alpha make better decisions and he or she can’t do that if the alpha can order them to shut up. Someone has to be able to call the alpha on his or her shit, basically,” he said with an amused little grin. “So he’ll be just as annoying as your beta as he was human.”

Derek actually looked relieved. “Good.”

Peter snorted. “God, you _like_ that smart mouth?” He rolled his eyes. “Whatever.” He held up a finger. “Although, sometimes the mate bond goes both ways,” he pointed out. “If he has feelings for you that are genuine, a mate bite will ramp that up to eleven. He’ll want your attention, he’ll demand your affection, and he’ll get very possessive if he thinks someone is trying to get you away from him.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “Trust me, that’s not something we’ve got to worry about.”

Peter shrugged. “You might be surprised.” He walked past Derek. “Either way, the pack will need their alpha even more tonight while adjusting to a new member.”

~

Derek, Scott, and Isaac all slept on the floor beside Stiles all night. When he woke up just before dawn, Scott was able to convince him to go back to sleep. Isaac sighed and yawned, standing. “I’ll go make breakfast,” he mumbled, walking sleepily out of the room.

Derek and Scott exchanged a long look and Scott put his head down beside Stiles, watching him tiredly. “We’ve got to tell his dad. Sheriff Stilinski needs to come here and get the whole story. It was one thing to keep it from him before, but Stiles is a werewolf now. He’ll need to know.”

Derek nodded. He watched Stiles sleeping and fought the urge to reach out and touch his face to know he was alright. “We’ll need Lydia more than ever,” he said softly. “God, it’s bad she’s leaving soon.”

Scott frowned. “Why? What’s Lydia got to do with it?”

Derek rolled his eyes at Scott’s lack of understanding. “Stiles was our ‘star human’. He could do things none of us could. Now that he’s a werewolf, we’re stronger as a pack, but we’re in more danger. He was the one who knew how to break werewolf barriers. He’ll have to teach someone else now.”

Scott gave him a dark look. “I’m assuming his putting off Stanford for a year is going to be ‘giving up on it’ huh?”

Derek closed his eyes, swallowing past another wave of guilt. “Scott, he said yes. He was dying. It was this or death. And he could still go,” he said weakly. “All of you had the choice. It’s just… harder to handle. Being cut off from your pack isn’t impossible. It’s just hard.”

“And let me guess, it’s harder being cut off from your _mate_?” Scott challenged and Derek glared at him.

“You know I didn’t know what I was doing,” he argued. “And no,” he said tightly. “For him, it won’t be any different.” He cringed. “He can go wherever he wants and it’s no different than any other beta.”

Scott frowned. “Why the emphasis on ‘for him’?”

Derek stood up. “What do you think, Scott? Use your brain for once.” 

~

Isaac finished breakfast and Derek went to wake Stiles up. He sat on the couch beside his hip and shook him awake. “Stiles. Stiles, you need to wake up.” 

Stiles groaned and swatted at Derek’s hands. Derek smiled in spite of himself and caught Stiles’s wrist. “Stoooop,” Stiles whined, blinking slowly, only to tense. Derek heard his heart skyrocket and he caught his fingers, holding his hand to lend him comfort. “Derek?”

“Calm down,” Derek said, taking his hand. “You’re fine.”

Stiles sat up, clinging to Derek’s hand. “What happened?” he asked, only to frown, then look up with wide eyes. “Oh _shit_!” He pushed his blankets down and looked at his side, taking in his perfectly healed over skin. “I’m- I’m a werewolf.” Derek nodded, waiting on Stiles’s reaction. Stiles stared at him and then smiled tentatively. “Well, I’m alive, that’s good.”

Derek nodded. “Are you…” He closed his eyes. “I’m sorry you got hurt. I’m sorry you’re stuck like this now. It wasn’t-“

“Whoa, hold up there,” Stiles said suddenly. He patted Derek’s shoulder. “I may have not wanted this before, but I’m sure as hell happier like this than dead. And you know I don’t mind. I mean, I’m not going to regret this, Derek. Hell,” he said, shrugging. “I’m probably way better prepared for this than anybody else who’s been bitten so far.”

Derek offered him a small smile. “We’ve got to call your dad and tell him to come over. He has to know now.”

Stiles paled. “He- he can’t.”

Derek nodded. “He can. And he has to.” Derek stood up. “We’ll let him come here and we’ll explain. Then you and I need to talk,” he said, looking pained. “Alone.”

Stiles snorted. “Good luck with that, everybody’s still, counting the heartbeats, here so there is no privacy in this house.” He froze and Derek’s lips tilted in amusement.

“You’re already hearing individual heartbeats? Maybe you are better prepared for this,” he said, nodding to Stiles before walking out. “Come eat after you call your dad.”

Derek passed Peter on his way into the kitchen and rolled his eyes at the look Peter was giving him. “Stiles take it well then?” Peter asked and Derek glowered. 

“Shut up,” Derek said gruffly. 

~

By the time Stiles’s dad arrived, everybody was eating. Stiles was actually shocked at how hungry he was. “Damn, no wonder Scott’s mom complains about how much she spends on groceries,” he said after eating his ninth pancake. 

Peter snickered. “And you’re a pretty lean kid. Imagine how much Derek eats,” he said, and Derek glared at him.

Stiles snickered. “Dude, that’s like your twelfth pancake. He didn’t have to point out to me that you eat a lot.” He narrowed his eyes. “I fed your ass for a few days that time, my dad thought I was keeping a stray dog in the shed out back-“ Stiles stopped and turned to the window. “Crap.”

“What is it?” Allison asked, and Scott walked to the window.

“Stiles’s dad. He’s coming up the path.” Stiles cringed and looked down at the table, scraping his nails at the chipped varnish. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to Lydia with a small smile. Scott walked over and leaned on Stiles’s shoulder, bumping his knuckles into his side. “It’ll be okay. Your dad will understand. If nothing else, he’ll understand soon enough.”

Stiles nodded tightly, picking at his borrowed clothes from Isaac. When the knock came at the door, Stiles stood up before Derek could. “Let me,” he said, and Derek nodded, following him. Derek stood back some, letting Stiles be the one to answer the door.

As soon as the door swung open, Stiles was swept back a few feet by the force of his father’s hug. “Oh God, you didn’t come home and I was so worried,” he said, pressing his face against Stiles’s hair. “Stiles, are you okay? Tell me you’re not hurt,” he said, pulling back to look him over. He slid his hands down Stiles’s arms, looking him over.

Stiles smiled tightly. “I’m fine,” he said before turning to Derek. “Should he- how should-“

Derek nodded towards the living room. “Living room. Scott, Peter,” he added softly. “Come in here.” 

Stiles brought his dad into the living room with the others behind them. Stiles sat next to Derek without a thought, putting his dad across from them. Scott sat on his other side and Peter stood, pacing behind the couch. “So… why does this feel like an intervention?” John joked and Stiles cringed.

“Well, more like an unveiling.” He cleared his throat and looked at Derek, who nodded. “Dad… this won’t be easy,” he said softly, then looked up. “Dad, we’re all werewolves,” he said tightly.

John rolled his eyes. “Nice try, Stiles,” he said. “C’mon, what’s up, Kid?”

Derek and Stiles shared a look and Stiles nodded to him. “Mr. Stilinski, don’t panic, okay?” he asked and then closed his eyes. When he raised his head again, John yelled slightly, tipping his chair some when he jumped back. “Don’t worry, nobody’s going to hurt you.”

“WEREWOLVES AREN’T-“

“Real?” Peter asked, changing into his own wolf form. “Sorry, Sheriff, but we are.”

Scott looked at the other two and then changed himself, earning an even harder stare from John. “My mom has known a while.” He shrugged. “She found out a few months after it happened to me.”

John turned to Stiles, a terrified look on his face. “Not you too.”

Stiles cringed. “Well, I haven’t done _that_ thing yet, but I am now,” he said softly.

John narrowed his eyes. “What do you mean ‘now’?”

“He was dying, you have to understand,” Scott said, and Derek shot him a look.

“Dying?!” John cried in alarm.

Stiles held up his hands. “Okay, beginning!” He pointed at Peter. “Peter was crazy and stuff and in a coma when the Argents – who are werewolf hunters - started baiting werewolves. It got back to Derek’s sister all the way in New York and she came back to Beacon Hills.” He pointed to Peter again. “Peter, while insane and catatonic mostly, killed her for her power since she was the alpha.” He gestured to Scott and himself. “I snuck out the night you found half of her body and Scott and I went into the woods because we’re terrible human beings and I’m terribly sorry I ever thought finding half a body would be cool,” he said to John who glared. Stiles waved at Peter. “Peter was out there and he bit Scott. Scott turned into a werewolf.” He pointed at Derek. “He wanted to find the alpha and kill it cause it killed his sister. The Argents were after them too which was ironic because at the time, Scott was madly in love with Allison Argent, as you know, and he was a werewolf and it was really freaking hilarious apart from the ‘oh crap my best friend is gonna die’ part,” he said and Scott nodded. “Long story short, Kate Argent – the one you finally ruled was the arsonist – was the arsonist, you were right, and Crazy Peter was killing them all and he killed her then Derek killed him,” he said, nodding to Derek again. “And he became the alpha.” He waved a hand. “Long story since then, but the highlights include the fact that Lydia is immune which you know now because that time she got attacked, it was Peter, but she didn’t turn or die. However, Dead Peter used her to attack Derek and resurrect him. So Peter’s a zombie werewolf.”

Peter smiled at the Sheriff. “I look good for a formerly dead guy, huh?” he asked, leaning against the couch back with a smirk.

Stiles gestured to Derek. “And two years later, here we are, and we’ve been running into supernatural trouble since then – minus the argents since most of them died and – slash – or left and they mostly quit the business – and last night I finally met my seriously anti-climactic end,” he said frankly. “Seriously, stabbed by a witch. Not even something cool, _stabbed_!” He took a breath then looked at the horrified face of his father. “I always said I was going to stay human, I didn’t want that to be your burden too like it has to be now that I’m a werewolf too, but it was either I die a human death, or Derek bite me and make me a werewolf.”

John looked on the verge of breaking down, but he looked at Derek and nodded solemnly. “Thank you for saving my son.”

Derek shook his head. “I wasn’t going to let him die. I let him choose and I’m glad he chose the bite instead of me having to tell you your son was dead.”

John actually flinched like he’d been hit. “Thank you,” he said again, putting his face in his hands. “Jesus, Stiles. Kid… what even?”

Stiles chuckled weakly. “I know.” Stiles bit his lip. “I’m sorry I lied for so long, Dad-“

“Not now,” John said, standing up. He walked over and Stiles stood to meet him, hugging him tight. “We can talk about that later all you want, but not just now.” He held Stiles, practically clinging to him. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to his son’s head. “You’re all I’ve got, Stiles, and I’m so glad you went with this instead of dying.”

Stiles whimpered, blinking hard against his dad’s shoulder. “I couldn’t leave you,” he admitted weakly, then sniffled. “I mean, c’mon,” he laughed out. “Who else would torture you about your cholesterol?” he asked, pulling back. He wiped at his eyes and smiled brightly. “Somebody’s gotta keep your butt in shape.”

“It is a nice one,” Peter muttered, and Stiles turned to gape whereas John just flushed uncomfortably.

“Dude! Don’t check out my dad!” Stiles said, rolling his eyes at Peter. Peter just shrugged innocently, though Stiles would see the smirk lingering in his eyes. 

John just patted Stiles on the arm, ignoring Peter’s remark. “You coming home?” he asked, and Stiles started to speak, but was cut off by Derek standing.

“Is it okay if I drive him home in a little while?” he asked, hands in his pockets. “We need to talk before I can send him home.”

Stiles cringed. “Only a week before the full moon, that is a problem,” he said, then nodded to John. “You’re heading home, right? I’ll get Derek to take me home in a little while.”

John nodded with a cringe. “I’ve got a hell of a lot to think about anyhow,” he said, cupping Stiles’s face in his hand one last time. “Just come home, okay?”

Stiles nodded. “I’ll be home soon, Dad. Promise.”

When John left, Derek and Scott both turned on Peter, glaring. Peter just smirked. “What?”

Stiles glowered. “You don’t hit on my dad, man. That’s like… rule number one.”

Scott made a face. “Seriously, what is up with you, first my mom and now Stiles’s dad?!”

Derek snorted. “Don’t worry, your mom was never real flirting,” he said, ignoring the leer Peter gave them all as he stalked out, heading to the kitchen to tell the others how things went. 

Stiles flopped down beside Scott, who looked confused. “Let me make this one easier than ‘everybody here is a dude; I think we’re in a gay bar’,” he said and Derek actually snickered. “Peter hits on dudes. A lot. All the time. Pretty much never saw him flirt with a woman he wasn’t manipulating. Understand?” he asked Scott, who just hummed.

“That explains a lot about Peter telling me how badly I dress,” he said, and Stiles rolled his eyes and patted his shoulder.

“Good job stereotyping, buddy,” he said, giving Derek an exasperated look when Scott got up and wandered off. “Why do I love him? Why did I pick _Scott_ to be my best bro?” he whined, flailing back against the arm of the couch. 

Derek chuckled hollowly. “Sometimes we don’t really have a choice,” he said, glancing up at Stiles searchingly. He swallowed his guilt and fear and stood up. “We need to talk, okay?” he said, and Stiles nodded.

“Where?”

Derek thought about it then nodded to the back door. “Let’s get out of the house. Go for a walk.”

Stiles raised an eyebrow. “You were serious about that privacy thing, huh?” he asked as he followed Derek out of the house. They walked for a good twenty minutes before Derek stopped at a couple of boulders and hopped onto one, kicking at the one across from it. Stiles hopped onto it and pulled his legs up, resting is arms on his knees as he faced Derek from a few feet away. “So… talking?” Stiles asked and Derek fought a wince.

“Stiles, I thought about not telling you but it would be dangerous and everybody else knows-“

“That’s never a good start,” Stiles said softly, features losing some color. “Derek, what’s wrong?”

Derek put his face in his hands, then looked up. “I screwed up,” he admitted in a tight voice. “God, Stiles, I screwed up bad and I’m so sorry,” he started. He looked up at Stiles with guilt and shame in his eyes. “You have to understand first that I wasn’t groomed to be an alpha. I was never going to be the alpha. It was always going to be Laura so she was taught things about being an alpha that I didn’t get a chance to learn. I had no idea what I was doing, I swear-“

“Whoa dude, breathe,” Stiles said, holding his hands up in alarm. “Derek… what did you do?” he asked calmly.

Derek flinched. “You know how everybody else I bit on their hip? And how Peter bit Scott on the hip?”

Stiles nodded, absently touching the still healing mark on his shoulder. “Yeah, is something wrong with biting me here?” he asked.

Derek took a deep breath before speaking. “I accidentally… gave you a mate bite,” he confessed. 

“A _what_ bite?!” Stiles asked suddenly and Derek nodded.

“I didn’t know! I went with instinct! I just bit you there without thinking, I didn’t know that was wrong!” he defended, eyes full of guilt. “I had no idea what I’d done until we got back home and people started talking.”

Stiles waved a hand. “No, stop, explain what this means. I thought a mate claim was something werewolves did when they got married.” Derek just stared at him repentantly and Stiles squeaked he gasped so high. “YOU WEREWOLF MARRIED ME?!” Stiles screeched. “Derek! Oh God, you’re my mate?! I’m a werewolf for less than twelve hours and I already have a mate?! Jesus Christ, I’m an eighteen year old with a _husband_!” 

“Not… not necessarily,” Derek interrupted. He took a heavy breath and looked up. “Alpha werewolves mate for life,” he said and Stiles just stared at him in shock.

“So… so this is it. You’re my mate,” he realized and Derek shook his head.

“No, _alpha_ werewolves mate for life,” he said, looking up at Stiles with a weak smile. “You’re _my_ mate. You’re still unattached. You’re not stuck with me, Stiles.”

Stiles frowned. “Wait, I’m not ‘stuck’ with you – don’t sell yourself short, by the way, you’re kind of a catch dude – but you’re stuck with me? How is that even a thing?! You can’t tell me that just because you messed up and didn’t know better you’re stuck for life with that mistake! Is there no werewolf annulment?!” he asked with a frown.

Derek shook his head, looking down in frustration. “It’s not like that either,” he admitted. He squeezed the bridge of his nose and looked skyward, avoiding Stiles’s eyes. “It wasn’t an accident, it was an instinct. There’s no way to ‘accidentally’ give someone a mate-claiming bite. If you bite someone there in self-defense, it’s just a bite, no claim is made.” He looked down, staring at his boots instead of meeting Stiles’s eyes. “You _are_ my mate. My wolf was only ever going to pick you. Werewolves don’t have to find their mate, you can have a relationship with anybody you want. And there isn’t just one possible mate, it just means my baser instincts chose you as a suitable mate. The wolf side of me recognized a good match and I didn’t know to fight the instinct when I was trying to save your life.”

Stiles was quiet. Almost too quiet. But Derek didn’t want to meet his eyes to check his reaction. “Derek, does that mean you care about me?” he asked in a careful voice.

Derek chuckled weakly, rubbing at his eyes. “Stiles, you’ve been my friend for two years, of course I do.”

“No, I’m asking you if you love me, Derek,” Stiles said in a serious tone. “Look at me?” he added softly.

Derek swallowed, but acquiesced, looking up to meet Stiles’s too-calm face that belied the panic he was facing inside. “I don’t… but I will,” he said simply.

Stiles nodded tightly. “How are we compatible? How the hell did your ‘baser side’ pick _me_?! We argue more than anybody else. We’re at each other’s throats half of the time when we do argue. There are days I genuinely want to punch you in your stupid, perfect face to make you stop being stupid, and your wolf decided ‘oh yeah, I want that’?!” he asked and Derek rolled his eyes, unable to fight an amused smile.

“Actually that’s exactly why, Stiles.” He nodded in the direction of the house. “If I give them an order and mean it, if I go genuine alpha on them, they _have_ to obey me. They can’t fight it really. They can if it’s something they’re willing to work hard to fight – like Scott with denying to kill with Peter at the start of all this – but normal orders they can’t disregard.” He gestured to Stiles. “But you can. The purpose of an Alpha having a mate is to help them be a better alpha.” He shrugged. “You can’t punch me until I stop being stupid if I can order you around.”

Stiles smirked. “So I can still tell you you’re wrong and when you go all ‘shut up Stiles’ I don’t have to?”

Derek smiled slightly, nodding. “Yes, Stiles, you can still annoy the hell out of me.” His smile slipped. “But yes, you are immune to my orders. You always will be now.”

Stiles frowned. “Wait, you said only you mate for life. Isn’t it dangerous? Having a beta that can disregard the alpha when the alpha relies on them _forever_ has to be a risk.”

Derek shrugged. “An alpha’s mate isn’t as much a ‘claim’ like it sounds. The alpha claims a suitable person as their mate, someone who will complement their own personality well, but even if the alpha can’t order their mate to stand down and shut up, they can still elect to ignore them. But the alpha _needs_ their mate. You can be an alpha without a mate, but a mated alpha makes the pack stronger. They need them to help them be strong and think straight. A beta or human claimed as an alphas mate has the choice of leaving because the alpha has the choice of ignoring them and shoving them aside. So alphas who have mates have to work for their mate.” He waved a hand. “It’s like any marriage, I guess. I mean I obviously know nothing about it, but in any relationship you have to compromise and work for it. Even if it’s just a friendship, you have to keep the other person happy and give them a reason to stay. The alpha and the alpha’s mate are like any other partners. It takes trust and compromise and sacrifice.”

Stiles shook his head, looking down. “It just doesn’t seem right. Why is it that an alpha doesn’t have to find a mate, but when he or she does it’s so important? And why are you _bound_ to me?” He looked up and met Derek’s eyes. “Derek, I don’t want to hurt you. I have… no idea what to even think about all of this. I don’t love you, I didn’t even know that was ever going to be an option, but the fact of the matter is, if you’re bound to me, I can hurt you easy and I don’t want to do that.”

Derek tensed. “No, it’s okay.” He closed his eyes. “I’m not going to let you sacrifice a normal life because I made a mistake. You don’t have to be stuck with me. You’re eighteen years old, Stiles, you should live your life and be young and free. I’m not going to hold you back.”

“Derek, I don’t want to hurt you!” Stiles argued. “You have been hurt so much by so many people and I don’t want to be added to that list!”

Derek looked up and forced a smile. “You won’t be. Look, just…” He cringed. “There are things you have to do and things I have to do to make this work out safely.” He squared his shoulders. “The most important thing is that I’m going to be possessive. I won’t be uncontrollably possessive, but if you really don’t want to hurt me, do your best to keep your relationships and your pack separate. I don’t just mean don’t bring anybody around us, I mean shower a few times before coming anywhere near me after you’ve…” Derek coughed. “Been with someone,” he finished awkwardly.

Stiles snorted. “Oh yeah cause that happens all the time! In fact I’ve got a date every night this week.”

“Stiles, don’t joke about this,” Derek started, but Stiles scoffed.

“Derek, come on, I’m an eighteen year old virgin, do you really think I’m suddenly going to have people dying to date me?!” he demanded. “Sure, the werewolf thing worked for a few people, but you didn’t see people lining up to bang Isaac and he was kind of always cute even before he got bit,” he pointed out. “But yes, I can promise I will definitely not suddenly be showing up smelling like a brothel, what with the whole ‘still a virgin’ thing!”

Derek cringed. “Could you maybe not say things like that?” he asked, and Stiles gave him a surprised look. Derek flushed, glowering. “I can’t help it, it’s been like twelve hours and I already want to kill someone just at the thought of someone touching you.” He fell back over his boulder, putting his hands over his face. “Oh God it’s going to suck when you do start having sex. I’ll have to wolfs bane myself to stop from ripping apart whoever touches you if it’s this bad just talking hypothetical.”

Stiles’s gut twisted and he watched Derek’s tense form with some trepidation. “Derek… is it really that bad?” he asked, and Derek nodded. Stiles cursed. “I’m really sorry, Derek.”

Derek shook his head. “It’s not your fault.”

Stiles shrugged. “It’s not yours either,” he defended and Derek chuckled weakly.

“Except for how it really is,” he whispered into his palms pitifully.

~

When Stiles got home, after talking with his dad and explaining more in more details, he immediately started researching. He researched anything and everything he could, going through old sources he hadn’t checked in a while, and even emailed a few people with questions in hopes they could help him out. After staying up most of the night, he finally called Derek. “Stiles, it’s three in the morning. You better be dying.”

Stiles snorted. “Oh like you’re not a night owl anyhow. I’ve got some information. Wanna come by and check things out?” he asked.

“Stiles, it’s three in the morning. First off, your dad would think something was wrong and panic thinking there was somebody hurt if he found me in your house in the middle of the night now that he knows. Also, I was _asleep_!” he growled and Stiles sighed.

“The one night you choose to sleep had to be tonight, huh?” He yawned. “Alright, I’ve got to come by tomorrow anyways. I’ll bring some notes.”

“I hate you so much, Stiles,” Derek grumbled, then promptly hung up. Stiles just rolled his eyes and went to get ready for bed.

~

Derek was already outside by the time Stiles got to the house. “What was so important you had to wake me up for?” Derek demanded as soon as Stiles got to the house.

“Don’t be so grumpy,” Stiles chastised, passing Derek into the house. He saw Isaac at the coffee maker and Peter already drinking a cup. “Good morning,” he said, skipping over to Isaac, stealing his mug as soon as he poured it. “Mmmm coffee.”

Isaac just huffed. “Rude,” he said, then curled into Stiles’s side, leaning into his hair. “Good morning,” he said, nuzzling against him. 

Stiles raised an eyebrow at Derek, who was in the doorway, and Derek shrugged. “You’re the alpha’s mate, it’s comforting to him,” he explained and Isaac pulled away, flushing when he realized what he’d been doing.

Stiles made a horrified face. “Oh God, I’m his ‘mom’ now, aren’t I?”

Peter grinned evilly. “You’ve been ‘mom’ for a while, Stiles, nobody just had the heart to tell you.”

Stiles started to argue but Isaac nudged him. “You made me and Scott peanut butter sandwiches before bed and covered us up with a blanket on the couch when we fell asleep last week,” he pointed out and Stiles groaned.

“Oh God. That’s it, Derek. This is why your instincts chose me,” Stiles said, flapping a hand. “I’m the one that actually takes care of your pack and you kinda still don’t totally rock at the alpha thing so your instinct to find ‘help’ picked me.”

Derek grumbled. “Maybe.”

“So, we’re talking about this then?” Peter asked from the table. “Open conversation?”

Stiles shrugged. “Why not? It’s not like you didn’t all know before I did. Ignoring the problem won’t make it go away,” he said, and Derek huffed.

“Maybe I don’t like being reminded how much I screwed up, Stiles,” he pointed out and Stiles just gave him a look. Derek sighed. “Fine, whatever, I screw up a lot, but this time it’s all on me-“

“I’m not arguing again, Derek, you are no more to blame than I am.” He finished his coffee. “Now, do you want my information or not?”

Peter snickered. “Pretty sure he wants a lot more than-“

“Thank you, not going there, shut up,” Stiles said, talking around the counter. “Right, THIS part of the conversation is going to be had away from Peter,” he said, snagging Derek’s shirt to make him follow. He led Derek outside and Derek perked up some.

“Hey, wanna see how well you run?” he said suddenly, looking happy for a change. “You were fast as a human so I bet you’re faster than Scott and Isaac.”

Stiles grinned. “You’re on, but two legs only!” he said, then took off running into the woods. He heard Derek laugh and he could hear him right behind him. Stiles really pushed and was more than surprised at how fast he could move and how much more nimble and agile he was. He leapt over a fallen tree like it was nothing. He hadn’t experienced too much as far as his wolf senses yet besides increased hearing he was still toying with, but it was amazingly freeing to run fast over uneven ground without difficulty. 

When Derek passed him, Stiles pushed harder, trying to catch Derek. He knew that it wasn’t really going to happen, but he was surprised that it wasn’t too hard to keep up with Derek for the most part. Derek finally slowed to a stop, he looked at Stiles with a genuine smile that Stiles hadn’t seen very many times. “You _are_ fast,” he said, panting slightly. “I mean, Isaac’s taller, so it can’t just be your height,” he said, walking backwards away from Stiles, towards the stream.

Stiles smiled and shrugged. “I had to keep up with werewolves as a human for a few years. You learn to run fast.” He leapt across the rocks, following Derek to the other side, careful of the slippery moss. Derek flopped down on a patch of grass on the other side of the stream and Stiles sat beside him. “So, information?” he asked and Derek nodded, lying on his back with his eyes closed against the sunlight. 

“Go for it,” Derek said, putting his hands beneath his head.

Stiles gathered his thoughts before speaking. “Okay so I think I’ve worked out how to make this work. It’ll take a lot of giving on my side, but I’m willing to do it for the good of the pack,” he started. “Okay so you said I’m still free, but can you see anybody at all? Anybody else?”

Derek snorted. “Stiles, looking back at my relationship history, does that even seem like a good idea?” he challenged.

Stiles kicked at his foot. “Okay so maybe your taste in women leaves something to be desired,” he allowed. “But what about just going out? I mean come on, you’re what - twenty-five? - and look like _that_? You gotta be getting some somewhere.” He wiggled his eyebrows even though Derek couldn’t see him with his eyes shut. “Can you still go have ‘Derek time’ at least?”

Derek paused and blew out a breath. “First off, I’m twenty-four, and to answer your extremely personal questions, I’m definitely not ‘getting some’ anywhere. Just because I’m attractive doesn’t mean I’m some sort of manwhore,” he defended and Stiles held up a hand.

“Hey, safe and consensual can totally be casual, I’m not judging! You think I’m a virgin by moral code or something? I’d totally get laid if I wasn’t such a loser,” he said bluntly. “I’m asking for future reference in regards to my idea, Derek, not to pry into your private life.”

Derek snickered and sighed, putting a hand over his face. “No, Stiles, I _could_ sleep with people, as in I would be physically able to, but I’m not going to _want_ to. I can try hooking up with someone but I may not even be able to physically want them. My instincts might go totally against it. So no, even if it’s not likely I’d be having sex anytime in the near future anyhow, all ‘Derek time’ as you put it will be _alone_ ‘Derek time’.” He squinted up at Stiles. “And what the hell could your idea be if it involves these kinda questions?”

Stiles faced him with a smug smile. “You’re going to need me around you, right? Well I can say goodbye to Stanford and say hello to somewhere closer and then just live with you,” he explained. “We don’t have to be in a relationship for my presence to positively affect you. As long as I don’t come home smelling like sex with other people, having me in the same house will not only help the pack on an instinctual level, but I can be there with you to help you when you need it. I can be your mate in the official sense without actually being in a relationship with you.” He scrunched up his nose. “Just sucks you can’t go have sex with other people, dude. I mean are you really expecting to _never have sex again_?!” he asked incredulously. 

Derek laughed softly, shaking his head as he closed his eyes against the sun again. “Stiles, I promise you, there comes a time where eventually you can think about things besides sex.”

“Hey, I think about a lot of stuff besides sex, dude,” he defended. “But the fact of it is, mammals are really fucking driven by their libido. I mean, you can curb your desires, sure. Look at monks and priests and stuff. But the average, healthy, non-morally-obligated person has a pretty strong sex drive until they’re in their forties or even later.”

“Yeah, but when you were practically the victim of pedophilia and that pedophile then turns around and murders everyone you love, you develop some serious trust issues that stay with you all through life,” Derek said softly. “Add that the two women I slept with since I was sixteen both tried to kill me or the people I care about, I’m pretty sure I’m not exactly your definition of ‘average, healthy male sex drive’,” he finished with a bitter twist to his voice.

Stiles paled and cringed. “Jesus, I keep forgetting how young you are,” he said, reaching out towards Derek, only to stop, unsure of where his hand was even going. Derek seemed to read his mind, though, because he caught Stiles’s hand without opening his eyes and slid their fingers together.

“Touching is a natural instinct, sorry if I left that one out.” He squeezed Stiles’s hand. “Especially for an alpha. Even without the mate bond, I’m more inclined to touch all of you. And with it, all of us are more inclined to touch you. Like Isaac.”

Stiles nodded, leaning closer so that his hip brushed Derek’s shoulder. “Okay,” he said softly. “But apart from the emotional trigger that I am an ass for bringing up, what do you think about my plan?”

Derek sighed heavily. “I don’t want you to give up Stanford, Stiles… but I think that’s out of the picture for now. I mean you can go if you want, but it will hurt everything about the pack. It will cause me to have serious depression risks having you away for that long and that will mess up the whole pack. And we could all move with you, but that wouldn’t be very productive to my territory staying mine.”

Stiles nodded and shrugged. “It’s okay, Derek. Whatever degree I get, I’m probably going to end up being a cop anyhow. I may as well just stay here and maybe I can end up a deputy at a station I already know. A lot of the deputies I know will still be around when I’m ready to start. Hell, my dad might still even be the Sheriff. I can get into the business just as well here as I could somewhere else.”

“I’m sorry,” Derek said and Stiles shushed him.

“I was dying, Derek. No amount of inconveniences eclipses the fact that I’m alive and I wouldn’t be if it wasn’t for this.” Stiles shrugged. “Honestly the only thing I’m really going to miss out on is a family, but I guess a pack is good enough.”

Derek opened his eyes suddenly, looking up at Stiles with a positively ill look. “Jesus, you wanted a family?” he asked roughly, and Stiles nodded with a sad smile.

“Never really worked out if I wanted a wife or a husband, but one or the other and then kids. Like… three of them,” he said with a wistful sigh. “Definitely not just one, though,” he whispered. “I mean my mom and Dad, they only wanted one kid and after the hyperactive mess I turned out to be, I don’t blame them at all,” he explained. “But growing up an only child was so lonely. They were only children so I didn’t have cousins to play with. I was the real only child. Ever. I never had anybody else as a little kid. It was fine once I met Scott when we were like eight, but as a little kid it was just me and my mom and dad.” He shook his head. “I wanted children. At least two and no real maximum other than ‘not a stupid number like twelve’.”

Derek stared at him. “I can’t imagine being alone as a child,” he said softly. He sat up. “I had my parents, Peter, an older sister, a younger sister, a baby brother, an aunt and uncle, and two cousins. All living together, I might add,” he said with a smile. “It was always crazy. Always. I was never alone growing up. God, six of them were werewolves so I was _never_ alone.”

Stiles shook his head. “I can’t possibly imagine how you’re still alive, Derek,” he said honestly. He squeezed his hand so tight it had to hurt. “I still feel like my mom dying is going to crush me some days. I was never suicidal but mostly I was too young to realize that was an option until it became clear my dad needed me.” He shook his head. “But you lost everything so suddenly. And then it never got better for you. Hell, it’s still more shit every day. Look at this crap we got ourselves into. It’s a lot easier than the heavy shit we’ve faced so far, but _everything_ goes sour for you and you still being alive is proof enough that you are so strong,” he stressed. Stiles smiled at Derek warmly. “I’m so proud of you. I’m sure nobody’s ever told you, but you’re brave and strong to have made it this far. People give up on life for so much less sometimes, but you fight for _everything_ no matter how much shit life throws at you.”

Derek swallowed hard and shrugged. “My pack has to go on. I’m going to be the last born Hale. I’m the end of a long blood line. I was always aware that I couldn’t give up because a history and a legacy ride on me. Even if I’m the end of the Hale pack, I’m not ending that line voluntarily.” He smiled sadly. “My mom, she would’ve told me not to pressure myself too hard, but I know she’d be proud of the alpha I’ve become,” he admitted, blinking a few times. 

Stiles smiled and met his eyes. “Peter told me one time that your mom was the most badass alpha to ever exist,” he said and Derek grinned.

“She was amazing. She could shift into an actual wolf. How cool is that?” he said, nudging Stiles. “You know, she and my dad were mates,” he mentioned. “My dad was turned, not born, and when they met her parents didn’t want her dating a turned wolf when she was always going to be a powerful alpha, but she didn’t let them stop her. Even before she was an alpha, she was very strong willed, they say. She and my dad became mates and then when she became an alpha after her dad died, they got human married and he took her last name,” he said and Stiles grinned.

“Talk about a modern marriage,” he said and Derek nodded.

“Yep. Hale is my mother’s name. The Hale pack goes back centuries and instead of just keeping their own names, my dad took her name. Peter always teased him about it when we were growing up,” he said with a fond smile.

Stiles huffed. “How fucking old is Peter, dude? I’ve asked him like twenty times before and he’s vague as hell.”

Derek smirked. “Younger than you think, but older than me-“

“Not you too!” Stiles whined, shoving at him. “Flat answer. Gimme.”

Derek shook his head. “I’ll give you a span,” he compromised. “Older than Laura was, and she was three years older than me, but young enough that we all pretty much ‘grew up’ together.”

Stiles huffed, but then cringed. “So how super gross was it that he hit on my dad yesterday with the knowledge that my dad is fifty-two?” he asked, and Derek made a face.

“Your dad is old enough to be his dad,” he said and Stiles groaned.

“Ew!” he stressed, shaking his head. “That’s just not right. Not right at all.” He cleared his throat. “So… speaking of my dad. He’s not going to take this ‘oh yeah I’m Derek’s mate and need to move in with him’ thing that well.”

Derek sat up and looked at him worriedly. “Maybe you can kinda just stay over sometimes? I mean, you can have a bedroom here and there. If you’re around enough maybe you don’t need to _live_ with me to benefit the pack.”

Stiles smiled. “That might work,” he said softly. “My dad will take it a lot better if I stay with him longer. Besides, I would’ve been living in a dorm in another year anyhow after this gap year. We can ease into it.”

Derek nodded, feeling more relieved. “You think we can make this work?”

Stiles squeezed his hand. “I’m pretty sure this is the best we can do without pulling this like an arranged marriage.”

~

Stiles was at Derek’s house when Chris Argent stopped by. Everybody was tense the second Allison knocked instead of let herself in like usual. Stiles smelled a new scent he didn’t know – finally he was learning scents after days without any new scenting smells – and he immediately went to Derek’s side when Derek got downstairs, every instinct screaming ‘get to Derek’. 

Peter came to lean in the doorway to the living room, Isaac wandering in to stand in the hall leading past the stairs, lingering a little behind Derek and Peter’s positions. Lydia was the only human at the house that day, so she nodded to Derek and answered the door. When she stepped back and swung the door open, Allison and Chris came in, Allison looking apologetic and Chris looking less uncomfortable than Stiles would’ve imagined. “Hi guys,” Allison tried, waving a little.

Derek glowered at Chris distrustfully, angling himself in front of Stiles a little more. Isaac looked between Derek and Chris nervously. Peter looked at the lot of them then snorted softly. “Why if it isn’t Daddy Argent,” he said, smirking at the Argents in a way that made Stiles somewhat disturbed. “Not that it’s not a nice change of scenery having a handsome man around for once,” he said and Stiles groaned, letting his head fall to thump against Derek’s shoulder while Isaac coughed to cover his laugh at the horrified look on Allison’s face and the glare on Chris’s. “However can we help you today?” Peter asked, licking his lips almost obscenely as his eyes wandered over Argent’s body from head to toe.

“Well to start with, you can promise to _never_ eye-fuck Allison’s dad in front of me again,” Lydia started, shuddering visibly. “I feel dirty and I wasn’t the one being sexually harassed this time.”

Peter just winked at Lydia, then let his predatory smirk turn into a grin. “Okay, okay, playtime is on hold, but seriously, what can we help you with, Chris?” he asked and Chris turned away from him, fixing his eyes on Stiles.

Derek leveled him with a warning look. “Do we have a problem, Mr. Argent?” 

Chris looked up to meet Derek’s eyes. “I’d say we have a situation. Not necessarily a problem, but something to be discussed at the very least.” He nodded to Stiles. “Our agreement said nothing about expanding your pack by biting more people.”

Derek raised an eyebrow. “Would you rather we wait for nature to take its course?” he asked, tilting his head towards Allison, who just huffed and rolled her eyes.

Chris just smiled, though his eyes clearly said ‘fuck off and die, Hale’. “I happen to know Allison and Scott are no longer seeing each other. Also, I’m pretty sure she isn’t seeing anybody else in this pack, but nice distraction tactic.”

Derek glowered and Stiles sighed, shoving him in the back on his way past. “Fine, let me do the words part of this little standoff,” he said, only to throw his hands up when Chris took an instinctive step back from him. “Oh my God, are you serious?!”

“Sorry, Stiles, but no matter what work we’ve done together in the past, you’re a freshly turned werewolf. You could fly off the handle any time this close to the full moon,” he said as he angled himself in front of Allison slightly.

Allison shoved him and glared. “Shut up, Dad, it’s _Stiles_.”

Stiles smiled. “Thank you,” he said, then put his hands on his hips, facing Argent defiantly. “Derek’s agreement said no pack-building, but there was nothing on there about emergency situations.” He pointed at himself. “I would not be standing here if I was still human. You know well by now that he turned me to save my life. That is _not_ forbidden in the contract he signed.”

Chris nodded. “Yes but it wasn’t in there at all. There was no thought that it would prove necessary-“

“Are you kidding me?!” Stiles interrupted. “Dude, humans in a werewolf pack and you didn’t think that would come up some day?”

Chris narrowed his eyes. “Lydia is immune, Allison would never take the bite, and I had really thought you would know better.” He shrugged. “Clearly I was wrong.”

Stiles’s face fell and his eyes narrowed. “You thought I’d ‘know better’ huh?” He stared Chris down. “You know, you hunters may have a seriously messed up way of life, but do you think for a second I regret taking the bite?!”

“I thought you didn’t want it. I trusted that you would choose humanity over the allure of power,” Chris said simply. “You know the consequences of the bite. You turned it down before-“

“I turned it down when I wasn’t _dying_!” 

“And I thought you would rather die than let yourself be turned into the thing that goes bump in the night,” Argent said simply. “I had high hopes for you, Stiles. You had a hell of a future-“

“Stop talking like I’m not still me,” Stiles argued. “You want to talk about death before taking the bite?! I thought about it, okay?!” He felt all eyes on him as a stunned silence fell over the room. “I don’t regret taking the bite for a second, but I did think about it. How hard being a werewolf is. How hard it is to live when people want you dead. How dangerous I am now.” He shook his head, swallowing. “I even thought about how if I just let go and stopped trying to stay awake I’d see my mother again,” he admitted, ignoring the gasp from Allison and the jerky movement Lydia made out of the corner of his eye. “I imagined how easy it would be to stop being so scared all the time. To stop worrying about my friends dying or killing people or any of it.” He never looked away from Chris Argent’s eyes. “But know what I thought about that kept me going and made me say yes?” he asked, tilting his head. “My family. My dad and Scott and my pack. If I died, my dad would be alone. Scott wouldn’t have me to watch his back anymore. May pack would suffer without the help I give them all. People would _hurt_ because I wasn’t strong enough to suck it up and take the bite over abandoning them.” He narrowed his eyes at Chris a little coldly. “You would know all about choosing death and abandoning your family over fighting to stay for them, wouldn’t you?”

Chris’s mask fell and the cold shock in his eyes was startling. “You don’t know what you’re talking about-“

“Oh don’t I?! That’s how you’re sick, twisted way of life dictates it, isn’t it?” Stiles challenged. “Death before fur-“

“Stiles, that’s enough.” Everybody jerked to look at Peter, shocked that he would be the one to interrupt. Peter tilted his head with a sad smile. “You got your point across. Don’t be cruel with it. You know as well as any of us what you’re doing,” he said and Stiles was taken aback by the truth behind his words.

“I- yeah.” He scratched at his neck awkwardly. “Look.” He met Chris Argent’s pain-filled eyes. “I’m sorry,” he said softly. “But the truth is still there. I chose being a werewolf because I was dying. Derek bit me because I was dying. Any other circumstances and neither of us would’ve did that.” He stepped back, stopping beside Derek. “And you can’t take action against him for that.”

Argent just sighed, rubbing at his forehead. “You’re a danger now, Stiles-“

“You talk like we would just leave him to run wild,” Isaac said, startling them all by speaking up. “Derek controlled three betas going wild and helped us find our anchors by himself. Now he’s got several of us and one beta that will need guidance for a few months. Stiles knows more about being a werewolf than any of us did so he’ll handle it all so much better. Stiles is not a danger to anybody,” he defended.

Chris shook his head. “He still will be dangerous. It’s a serious shame it came to this.” He nodded to Stiles. “I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt, but if you stray out of line, you know the consequences.”

Stiles nodded soberly. “I would rather you put me down than let me hurt anyone if the issue comes up,” he said seriously. Chris didn’t even look surprised, he just nodded.

“Good, because I won’t hesitate to do it if I have to.”

Stiles smiled sadly. “I couldn’t live with myself if I killed someone who didn’t deserve it. I don’t want you to hesitate just because you secretly totally enjoy working with me,” he teased and Argent actually laughed.

“Now you’re funny,” he said, then turned to meet Derek’s eyes. “Keep him in line.”

Derek actually looked worried suddenly. “Wait… do you have a cage?” he asked and Stiles gave him an offended glare. Derek narrowed his eyes at him pointedly. “Going alpha didn’t work that well with the first three and you’re immune to my orders, I have to lock you up, Stiles, and I sealed off the cellar.” 

“Immune?” Argent asked suddenly, eyes flickering from Stiles to the others. “Why is he immune? Is that possible? I’ve never heard of a beta that could disobey an alphas direct orders. It’s not anything we’ve ever run into.”

Stiles hesitated, turning to Derek. Derek glowered at Argent, mouth pressed into a tight frown. Isaac shrank back a little and Allison and Lydia exchanged glances filled with panic. It was Peter who finally chortled and tossed Argent an amused little smirk. “You’re not going to break the code, Chris, we all know you are above your family’s old dark ways,” he said and Derek made an abortive motion like he wanted to shut Peter up, but it was too late. “So you can be made aware that Stiles is Derek’s mate.”

Chris gave him a wide eyed look, then turned to Stiles. “ _Mate_?” he asked, frowning. “Why don’t we have the information-“

“Because,” Peter interrupted. “Your kind see it as ‘husband and wife’ when you look at pack dynamics. You see betas with their husband or wife. You see an alpha with a husband or wife. Humans assume mated pairs are just a married couple because werewolves are the only ones who know the significance of an alpha’s mate and they would die before giving that weakness away to hunters.”

“Yeah, thanks for that, Peter,” Stiles drawled, glaring at him. “Great way to expose weaknesses to a freaking hunter!”

Allison shook her head. “Dad isn’t really a hunter and he’d never use something like that to his advantage,” she said, and he nodded.

“Whatever history my family has here, I want nothing of the sort,” Chris promised. “Although,” he turned to Peter. “You’re saying Derek can’t give him direct orders? How is that not a danger to the pack?”

“Because I’d never betray my pack,” Stiles said with a glare. “Maybe it was an accident and Derek didn’t know what he was doing, and maybe we’re not exactly ‘husbands’, but no matter what, he’s my alpha and I would never betray my pack just because I don’t have to obey direct orders,” he defended. 

Argent stared at him for a while, and then nodded. “Alright. We can work with this.” He turned back to Derek. “I gave Deaton my cage since I had no use for it anymore. He should still have it and he would offer it up to you, but if you can’t get a cage, do whatever you have to to keep him on lock down because I do not want to have the blood of the sheriff’s kid on my hands.”

Derek nodded seriously. “You won’t have to,” he said with finality, clearly ending the discussion then and there.

~

Derek wanted the other’s gone for Stiles’s first full moon. Peter was taking them out running while Stiles and Derek stayed in the house. They had managed to get a cage from Deaton and the only place enclosed enough to keep him from breaking something if he got out of the cage was the laundry room. Stiles couldn’t help but snort at the fact he was sitting in a cage beside the washing machine while Derek stretched out on top of the washer and dryer since there wasn’t really any floor space left with the cage in there.

“Sooo you gonna take a nap up there, Simba?” Stiles asked, looking up at Derek, whose eyes were shut as he lay sprawled on his belly with his head pillowed on his hands and his feet propped against the shelf with the detergent on it.

Derek grunted. “Just relaxing while I can. Another half hour and I have a feeling I’ll regret being in a room too small to really escape your reach through the bars.”

Stiles hummed. “Why are you so convinced I’m going to be that much trouble? You handled three betas at once with less restraint than a cage.”

“You’re defiant and stubborn as hell. Not to mention smarter than all of those three combined,” he admitted, making a face. “Probably stronger too. You were strong before being turned. The bite made them all strong.” He snorted. “You’re going to be hell tonight.”

Stiles cringed. “Great. Just make sure the cage holds me.”

Derek looked down at him and nodded. “It will. You won’t get out of this room, I promise. And you’ll learn it faster. We can start teaching you to control the change as soon as possible.”

“How do you control it?” Stiles asked, rolling his shoulders. “I mean, Scott learned to control it because he didn’t want to kill his girlfriend or be killed by her dad. He couldn’t even control himself the day of the full moon.” He grumbled. “He fucking made out with Lydia and then gloated about it to me that bastard,” he muttered and Derek shot him a look. “What?! I was at the highest point of my devotion to the Worship of Lydia Martin and my best friend made out with her just cause he had full-moon horniness or some shit. Then I had to chain him to a radiator so he didn’t eat me.” He cringed. “And that was so awkward because I had a big ass chain in my locker and it fell out in front of everybody and I’m pretty sure the whole school heard I was into kinky bondage shit by the end of the day.” He hummed. “That might be why I still can’t get laid. Everybody around here went to high school with me and think I’m a freak and they just aren’t into kinky stuff.”

Derek couldn’t help but snicker. “Imagine what they’d think if they knew they were for Scott.”

Stiles squirmed a little then whined. “So Derek. That thing about controlling it? Any tips?” he asked, shoulders tight.

Derek could feel the pull of the moon and he knew how bad it had to be for Stiles. “Okay think of something that can keep you human. It can be anything. Hell, maybe for you it’s curly fries,” he muttered and Stiles just shot him a look. “Just think of something that makes you feel human. Something that you can latch onto.”

Stiles closed his eyes and nodded, sweat beginning to dampen his hairline. “What is it for you?” he asked and Derek hesitated. “Derek?”

Derek looked up, meeting Stiles’s eyes, unsurprised to see them glinting a lighter gold than his normal honey-brown eyes. “It used to be anger. My guilt and anger were what kept me human,” he said, and Stiles nodded.

“What is it now?” he asked curiously, nails already growing into claws.

Derek chuckled weakly. “Well, for a while now it’s been the pack. It’s not as hard anymore so my anchor doesn’t have to be so extreme. But I have a feeling this will be the last moon I use that anchor.”

Stiles looked up and swallowed when he saw Derek looking at him meaningfully. “You think you’re going to fall in love with me that fast?” he teased, grinning even though he was struggling to keep the feral side from clawing free.

Derek shrugged. “I could,” he admitted. “But most likely it will be less emotional and more pragmatic. An alpha-mate is meant to be a life anchor, really. Not just for the moon but for everyday pack relations. Everyday things are done with the alpha-mate’s thoughts and opinions in mind.”

“So I’m a nagging wife?” Stiles joked and Derek smiled slightly.

“Not like that. Just like any couple, you have to think that what you does doesn’t only affect you, but your partner as well. That’s what the word ‘partner’ means. Working together to lead the pack requires considering the alpha-mate in every decision.” He nodded to Stiles. “Pretty sure by next month I’ll be in the habit of thinking about how everything affects you so my anchor will be you more likely than it will be the pack.”

Stiles growled, closing his eyes as his fangs grew and the urge to _hunt_ grew. “Fuck, Derek!”

Derek looked down into the cage and shook his head. “Think of your anchor. Think about it. Focus on it.”

“I- I can’t!” Stiles gritted out, only to lash out at the bars so that Derek had to jump back. 

“Tell me about your anchor!” Derek said quickly, kneeling on the washer. “Tell me about it in detail. Focus, Stiles.”

Stiles let out a low growl, but managed to back down some, leaning over on all fours, claws digging into the steel floor of the cage. “My- My dad. He needs me. I’m all he has. He relies on me for everything. I clean the house, I cook, I keep him- keep him from ruining his diet.” He rolled his shoulders. “He- he has so much he needs me for and if I lose it- if I hurt someone and have to be put down he would lose himself.”

Derek’s eyes softened and his chest ached some, remembering the way Stiles’s father had clung to him, holding him with more fear and relief than anybody besides a parent could manage. “You’re a good son,” he said, and Stiles laughed a laugh that was nearly a growl. “And don’t worry, you’re not going to die. We’ll protect you.” He leaned over the cage to see if Stiles heard. “Stiles? Stiles, look up,” he said, only to jerk back when Stiles suddenly lunged at the cage, growling and snarling in a nearly fully feral state, claws coming between the bars to reach for Derek, swiping with his claws. Derek sighed and slid back over to the dryer, settling in. “Well, you held off longer than I thought you would,” he muttered as he got as comfortable as someone could sitting on a dryer.

~

When Stiles woke up, he immediately felt like he’d bashed his head into a wall a few times. He tried to roll over and winced when several muscle aches made themselves known. He tried to raise his hand to scratch at his nose only to frown when his hand didn’t come to him. He opened his eyes and suddenly the memory of last night hit him and he realized he was in the cage still. He lifted his head and looked at his hand only to freeze. 

Derek was laying on the floor using a pile of dirty tee-shirts as a pillow next to the cage. Also, his hand was holding Stiles’s captive against the floor just outside the cage. Stiles couldn’t help but smile softly at how adorable Derek looked curled up in a ball to sleep. His knees were tucked close to his chest and his free arm was curled under him, against his chest. Stiles lifted up on his elbow and realized he was mirroring Derek’s position inside the cage. The question of whether it was instinct or coincidence was interrupted by the door swinging open. Stiles whimpered at the flood of light and covered his eyes.

“Awww, how sweet,” Peter drawled and Stiles fought back a growl. Stiles yawned into his hand, only to hear the fake-shutter sound of a picture being taken. He yelped and sat up quickly. 

“You better delete that!” Stiles whined in a sleep-rough tone. He looked down when he felt Derek tugging at his hand as he woke up. Stiles rolled his eyes and stabbed Derek’s wrist with his fingernails, startling him into letting go before yanking Stiles’s hand until he was pressed against the bars.

Derek looked at him tired, then hummed, looking at his hand. “Oh. Sorry,” he said, only to frown when he looked up at Peter. “What’d you do?” he demanded with a grumpy little pout, eyes squinted against the light behind Peter. 

Peter just smirked, shoving his phone in his pocket. “Nothing much. Just comment on how sweet you two are,” he cooed. “Even with a cage between you, you were curled up holding hands and facing each other.” He eyed Stiles and didn’t see any blood on his clothes. “Huh, I’m guessing you weren’t as violent as we worried, then?”

Derek stood up and stretched, shaking his head. “He thrashed a lot, but he held out longer than I expected. And after thrashing a while, he calmed down.”

Stiles frowned. “Dude, I’m having trouble remembering the more feral moments, but did I actually sit there and pout at you for a while?” he asked, cringing. “Ow, the headache from bashing my skull into the metal combined with memory gaps and regret make it seem like I had a way better night than I really did.”

Derek snickered. “You were less ‘rage kill’ and more ‘why did you lock me up?’ actually. I’m impressed.” He undid the lock on top of the cage and opened the door so that Stiles could slide out and stand up.

“Ow, ow, ow, pins and needles,” Stiles groaned, stretching to his full height for the first time in a solid ten hours. “Oh that isn’t fun at all.” He cracked his knuckles and yawned, stretching. “I remember coming through a few times, but mostly I was in the back seat the rest of the night so I’m not sure what I remember.” He narrowed his eyes at Derek. “Sure I wasn’t too bad?”

Derek shook his head, smiling. “It seems even your ‘feral’ isn’t that bad. I mean there was a lot of growling and snarling, but it seemed more pissed at me for locking you up than ‘rip your throat out with my claws’,” he explained.

Stiles frowned suddenly, looking at the cage, then at Derek, eyes suddenly widening. “You dumb ass!” he cried, shoving Derek in the shoulder. “You _fell asleep_ on the floor with the cage within ‘rip your throat out with my claws’ distance!” He huffed. “What if I’d hurt you?!”

“I just said you had calmed down,” Derek argued, frowning. “You were pretty calm and you looked sad so I laid down to talk to you. I was trying to get Stiles through the feral wolf, but you were just calm and feral-“

“And what if I’d snapped out of that and into ‘rage and murder’?!” Stiles complained, pushing past Derek with a huff, knocking Peter out of his way. “Swear to God, you’re so stupid-“

“Stiles, you weren’t going to hurt me!” Derek said, following him into the kitchen. “It wasn’t a problem. I could sense you were docile. And you were sad, what did you think I’d do? Sit there and ignore you?! I need you to be comfortable with me even if you are feral-“

Stiles turned and glared. “I could’ve hurt you, Derek! The point of locking me up was to keep me from hurting anyone! What if I’d attacked you in your sleep?!”

Derek grumbled. “I am the alpha, I could’ve stopped you. I could’ve got away before you had a chance. Do you think I’m that heavy a sleeper?!”

Stiles just crossed his arms, glowering. “Your face was in my reach. I could’ve ripped out your throat before you had a chance.” He put his face in his hands. “Damn it, Derek, don’t you ever do something that stupid again, you dumbass!”

Derek threw his hands up. “Fine! Whatever! God, you trust a friend not to kill you and suddenly you’re a dumbass,” he grumbled as he shoved past Stiles and headed for the stairs.

~

After the first full moon, Stiles got serious about demanding he learn how to control it. He had to be taught how to control himself and he wasn’t going to risk another full moon as a risk to anybody. Derek had never had one of the others nearly as devoted to training the way Stiles was. Whenever Scott and Isaac wandered off to do whatever they did (he had theories but he really didn’t want to know) away from the house, and when Peter went into town for no apparent reason at all, Derek was left with only an occasional human to help as he worked to train Stiles. Lydia was busy a lot of the time so more often than not, it was just Derek, Stiles, and Allison training in the woods. Allison would run and hide and Stiles would have to find her. Or she would get rubber tipped arrows and shoot at them and he and Stiles had to not get hit. 

Sometimes, though, everybody was actually around for training. One afternoon in particular where everybody was there, Derek called a game. “What kind of game?” Scott asked suspiciously.

Isaac nodded. “For you a ‘game’ usually involves blood loss.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “Actually, I’m thinking we play tag,” he said and Scott looked confused.

“You… want to play tag?” he asked skeptically.

Lydia perked up. “So you’re gonna run around and we get to just sit? Great! It’s hot as hell,” she said, going to plop herself down on the porch.

Derek grinned. “Actually, you and Allison get to try and shoot us.” He turned to the others. “That’s the harder part. Tag as in running from the person who is ‘it’ while dodging pellets.” He shook his head. “No real bullets, I’m tired of blood stains. Allison, there are some air rifles inside for you and Lydia. Peter, you’re in on this with us.”

Isaac grinned. “Sounds fun.” He looked at Stiles then suddenly reached out and touched him. “Stiles is it!” he cried, running off into the woods. Scott and Derek both ran and Stiles gaped, then turned on Peter, who just smirked and ran, Stiles on his heels.

They ran around and around the house, in and out of the woods, laughing and shouting to each other, including some yelps when one of the girls shot them. It was actually really fun, if Stiles was honest. Even Peter seemed to be enjoying himself. By the time Allison called a water break, everybody was hot and sweaty in the afternoon sun. Stiles groaned when they got up to the house and pulled his shirt off, wiping his face before tossing his shirt onto the porch. 

“Holy _crap_!” Lydia said when she stopped on the porch. Allison bumped into her, spilling some water.

“Lydia?! What are you- _whoa_!” Allison gaped and Stiles looked up, only to frown when they were both staring at him.

“What?” he asked, looking down at himself. “Do I have pellet marks on my back?” he asked, trying to look at his own back. 

Scott laughed as he walked up. “Dude, what are you _doing_?” he asked Stiles, who was spinning in a circle trying to look at his back.

“I dunno, Lydia and Allison keep staring at me, so I’m looking to see what it is,” Stiles said, stopping to turn back to the two girls. “What’s up?”

Allison blinked and Lydia made a confused face. “When did you get _hot_?” she asked in confusion.

Stiles flushed, then spluttered. “What?! I’m not _hot_ \- oh do you mean the sweaty thing? Yeah, it’s pretty hot out-“

“Trust me, Stiles, we totally mean hot the other way,” Allison said, gaping. “You- does the bite do that? Really?”

Isaac walked over, glancing at Stiles. “What are you talking about? Stiles looks the same as ever.”

Scott nodded. “Yeah. I mean…” He tilted his head. “I dunno, you grew into your arms a little, but that’s just cause you had that growth spurt last year.”

Stiles crossed his arms over his chest. “Hey, so, can we stop critiquing Stiles’s body please? A little self-conscious with people inspecting my shirtless body.”

Allison just shook her head. “You should never wear a shirt. Ever,” she said and Lydia nodded seriously.

Peter snorted. “If we’re all done ogling Mr. Stilinski, could we please get back to training?”

Lydia flapped a hand. “Wait, wait, wait. You mean you’re serious? _Stiles_ has always been sexy?!”

Scott made a face. “Stiles isn’t _sexy_. He’s _Stiles_ ,” he stressed.

Isaac shrugged, looking at Stiles. “You’re cute enough. I mean, it’s just hard to think ‘sexy’ when I’ve been seeing you naked for the past three years in the showers.”

Stiles just rolled his eyes. “I’m not ‘sexy’. Trust me, I spent those same three years like two lockers away from Danny. _That_ is ‘sexy’. I’m just…” He gestured to himself. “Not bad.”

Peter just smirked from his spot leaning against the post. “There’s no shame being more ‘lean muscle’ than bulk. You’ve got the ‘pretty’ thing down. Too much muscle would ruin that whole ‘twink’ thing you’ve got going on-“

“Annnnd that’s my cue to put my clothes back on!” Stiles grimaced and shrugged his shirt back on. “No. Never again. I’m not gonna be called a twink by a creepy old man,” he said, shuddering comically.

“Hey, you’re legal, so it’s not creepy anymore-“

“Okay, okay, can we please not?” Derek asked, walking over with a bottle of water. He gave Peter a dark look. “Seriously, creepy. You’re being it,” he said, shoving the bottle at him.

Peter just smirked. “Whatever you say, Derek,” he said, winking at him as he passed. Stiles just pretended to not see the flush that settled high on Derek’s cheeks as he stalked away.

~

For the rest of the summer, things went well. Stiles was fully able to control himself by the second full moon and the pack was noticeably more relaxed by the addition of another member. Even Peter and Derek fought less with Stiles around to calm things down. Things got a little lonely when Lydia and Allison both left for college. Scott and Isaac were both taking classes at the local college (it was a small school but it wasn’t like it wasn’t an accredited school) and working with Dr. Deaton. Most days Stiles was either at home alone, at the Hale house with Derek and occasionally Peter, or if it was a lucky day, he hung out with his dad. But for the most part, Stiles was left to his own devices. 

He did discover, however, that Derek did almost absolutely nothing. He spent his free time working out, walking around in the woods, or sitting quietly. It was unnerving for Stiles to look up from reading a book and see Derek just sitting in a chair looking out the window, having not moved for over an hour. Even Peter went out. Stiles didn’t know where he went but he figured that was probably better for all of them. 

After a week of Derek doing pretty much nothing even if he had a perfectly good TV and decent internet, Stiles showed up at the house on a mission. He met Peter on his way out and raised an eyebrow at Peter’s well-tailored shirt with the top buttons undone and his pressed slacks. “What do you _do_ in town?” Stiles asked without thinking, then stopped when Peter smirked. “No, nope, forget I asked,” he said as he flapped his hand. “I don’t even want to know, I’m sure.”

Peter just chuckled. “Well I’m not killing people, buying prostitutes, or stealing anything, so don’t worry about your father arresting me,” he comforted, nodding to Stiles as he left and got into his car. 

Stiles continued into the house and rolled his eyes when he found Derek – unsurprisingly – working out upstairs on the landing. He stopped halfway up the stairs and put his hand on his hip, the other on the banister as he watched Derek doing one-armed pushups. “Seriously, Derek?” he asked in exasperation.

Derek grunted. “What?” he asked, swapping arms without putting both hands down at once. 

“Do you even know what ‘fun’ is?” Stiles asked, earning a glare. He shook his head. “Okay, up. Go shower. We’re going out.”

Derek frowned, pausing in his pushups to look up at Stiles. “Excuse me?” he asked, looking almost affronted at being told what to do. “Since when?”

Stiles ran up the last few steps and hopped on Derek’s back, making him put both hands down to stop his face hitting the floor when he fell. Stiles smirked, straddling his back. “Since I realized you literally do nothing but exercise, train, and emote your inner angst like you’re freaking Mr. Darcy or something.”

Derek grunted then pushed up, taking Stiles with him. “I don’t wanna go out,” he said, and Stiles yelped when he continued his pushups with Stiles sitting on his back.

“Wow, okay, not that this isn’t totally impressive, but no,” Stiles said, kicking Derek’s wrist out from under him so he fell on his front. “We’re going out, Mopey McMoperson. We’re gonna find you a hobby. Or at least get out and teach you how to go into public without looking like a serial killer all the time,” he said, jumping up. “Now go shower. You need to become a more well-rounded human being.”

Derek glared when he stood up, though Stiles could tell it was his petulant child glare, not actual anger. “I’m not a human being; I’m a werewolf,” he countered and Stiles pointed at the bedroom silently. Derek screwed up his face. “I’m not actually a grumpy toddler, Stiles, you can’t just-“

“Derek, I’m trying to help you become a more grounded person with a _life_!” Stiles stressed. “You don’t have to go make friends, I’m not going to take you and drop you off on a play date,” he said and Derek glowered. “We’re going to town. Like normal people. We can go get lunch and maybe go shopping. Find something in this world you are interested in besides nature and feeling sorry for yourself,” he said and Derek actually gaped at him. Stiles felt bad for a second, but then shook his head resolutely. “I get it, your life is hard, bad shit happens, I’m not downplaying any of your pain, man, but you have wallowed in guilt and pain for so freaking long that you literally have nothing else, Derek.” He walked closer, smiling sadly. “You don’t listen to music. You don’t watch movies. You have absolutely nothing to do with anything but the pack.” He shook his head. “You have to have interests, Derek. Somewhere in you there’s a man who has to have a taste in music and in films. You have to have a part of you that played a sport or read a certain author.” He touched his arm lightly. “It’s about damn time you found ‘Derek Hale the person’ in amongst ‘Derek Hale the victim’ and ‘Derek Hale the alpha’.”

Derek actually swallowed, staring at Stiles like he wasn’t sure what had just happened. “I-“ He stopped, and eventually nodded. “Okay, I’ll go get ready,” he muttered, turning to head to his bedroom to shower and change. 

Stiles let out a shaky breath and prepared himself for what was sure to be a day full of brooding and possibly angry Derek on his hands.

~

Stiles demanded to drive, so he and Derek rode into town in his jeep. The first place Stiles took Derek was a book store. Books seemed to be a very Derek thing, so he hoped to get a decent sense of Derek’s likes and dislikes. When they walked in, Stiles turned his back and faced Derek. “Right, so what kind of books did you like as a kid? We’ll start there because anything you liked in New York is probably tinged with guilt,” he said and Derek rolled his eyes, but only hesitated as long as it took to glance at the mystery section. Stiles actually bit back a snicker. “Mystery for the master lurker, that’s shocking,” he said and Derek glared. “Okay so tell me,” he said on his way to the mystery section. “What books did you read that weren’t required for school?”

Derek sighed, shoving his hands in his jeans pockets – Stiles had forbid him wearing his leather jacket because it was too ‘broody’ – and thought back. “Okay I was thirteen, I had two sisters, and if you laugh I’ll kill you,” he said and Stiles waited patiently. Derek looked pained as he spoke. “I liked Nancy Drew.”

Stiles fought back the gleeful laughter that wanted to escape and he held it down. “Okay so… detective story mysteries. Simple whodunits.” He took a look around the displays in the mystery section proclaiming best sellers. “Oh!” He grabbed a paperback and held it up. “Ever read this one?” he asked, holding it out to Derek. “I saw the movie before I read the book, the movie was better, but the book was pretty great.”

Derek read the back, then made a face. “Wow, maybe not something that opens with a ten year old being raped?” he asked, looking kind of horrified. “I think I’m emotionally scarred enough without thinking about little girls being raped,” he pointed out, and Stiles chuckled.

“So less violence against children. I can work with that!” He hummed. “Oh hey, how about old school Agatha Christie? I always loved Hercule Poirot,” he said, pushing some aside. “Murder On The Orient Express is the best,” he said, pulling it out and handing it to Derek. “Oh, hey, And Then There Were None! This one is great, it’s very ‘Clue’-esque.” He turned around. “Oh hey, did you ever read Sherlock Holmes stories in English?” 

Derek nodded. “Yeah, in ninth grade we had to read The Red-Headed League and-“

“The Speckled Band?” Stiles asked, grinning. “Yep. Still in the curriculum.” He walked over and grabbed A Study in Scarlet. “This one’s good. It gets really confusing with the sudden backstory that is totally unnecessary, but trust me, it’s worth it.” 

“When do you have time to work out so much about books?” Derek asked with a frown. “I mean, you don’t seem like the time to read much.”

Stiles huffed. “Dude! I graduated third in my class, I like to read! I just like to do other stuff too.”

Derek looked up, surprised. “You were third?”

Stiles frowned. “Uh, yeah? You were at graduation, you saw I sat beside Danny.”

Derek nodded. “Yeah, but I didn’t know you guys were arranged by grades. I just thought it was random or something. It wasn’t alphabetical and I thought Lydia and Danny were just in the first two seats because they had to give speeches.”

Stiles cringed. “You didn’t graduate, I forgot.”

Derek huffed. “Hey, I got a GED, it’s good enough.”

Stiles held out a hand to smooth his ruffled feathers. “No, dude, I didn’t mean you were unintelligent, I just meant you never participated in a graduation.” He nodded. “But yeah, it’s arranged by GPA. Lydia and Danny had straight A’s and I had a B or two in there.”

Derek just shook his head. “It’s kind of terrifying that _you_ are extremely intelligent,” he said, and Stiles huffed, shoving him. “What?! It’s true! You are a giant spaz-“

“Oh my God, shut up,” Stiles argued, though he couldn’t fight a smile at the teasing grin on Derek’s face. “At least I don’t sit around being emo all the time,” he said and Derek frowned.

“Being what all the time?” he asked, making a face.

Stiles just gaped. “Oh my God, did you _miss emo_?!” he asked, then frowned. “Actually, you’re a very lucky person,” he said in mock seriousness before tugging Derek by the wrist. “C’mon, we’re gonna find you some non-mystery books. Maybe a good dirty romance novel-“

“Don’t make me eat you,” Derek deadpanned, earning a laugh a little too loud for a book store as Stiles turned away from the pink and red books with bare-chested men on the front and went for the fantasy section instead.

~

“Oh come on!” Stiles stared when Derek stopped outside the _comic book store_. “No, I can’t. You cannot tell me _Derek Hale_ reads comic books.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “You say that like I’m some mythical creature,” he accused and Stiles just shot him a pointed look. Derek huffed. “Hello, you are too-“

“No, I don’t mean _that_ , I mean that you’re like some tall, dark, and handsome angst animal,” he said, walking closer. “You are the type to like black coffee to match your soul and dark, depressing poetry by candlelight. Not… spandex suited super heroes!”

Derek just smirked. “What if I told you that Extremis is my favorite story arc in The Incredible Iron Man history, even more than Demon In A Bottle?” he asked, and Stiles’s jaw dropped and he gasped violently.

“Oh my GOD what are you?!” He made a show of leaning in to sniff Derek. “You don’t _smell_ like grease and electronics so you aren’t a robot impersonator.”

Derek laughed. “Stop it,” he said, then hooked Stiles’s shirttail, tugging him as he pushed open the door and headed inside. “Ultimate way to be sure you’re worthy of my pack,” Derek started, and then gestured to two sections. “Marvel or DC?” he asked.

Stiles bit back a grin. “Well, I’m a huge Batman guy-“

“Disowned!” Derek said suddenly, voice actually light and playful. “Disowned and kicked out of the house. And a divorce,” he added, grinning when Stiles started cracking up. “Also, dishonor on your family. Dishonor on your _car_ -“

“Hey, leave Baby out of this,” Stiles countered, then rolled his eyes. “Oh my God, how are you actually Derek?” he asked, elbowing him playfully. 

Derek just shrugged. “You don’t know me as well as you thought you did?” he offered, then turned to start over to the Marvel section. “Come young padewan, there is much to teach you-“

“OH my GOD!” Stiles wandered after Derek, gazing at him in distrust. “You cannot tell me you’ve been hiding your inner geek all this time!”

Derek chuckled, shrugging. “Not really. I mean, come on, what teenage boy doesn’t at least know Star Wars, even if it’s not a big thing? Same with comic books. I mean, I was eleven when X-men came out in theatres, the summer before I turned twelve.” He looked among the shelves, fingers sliding across covers. “Me and Laura would pretend we were X-men all the time playing around outside. She was thirteen, nearly fourteen, so that was probably the last summer she didn’t feel too ‘grown up’ to run around playing with her little brother,” he noted as he stopped and stared at Wolverine on the cover of a comic with a distant smile. “We would fight over who got to be Wolverine. I wanted to be him cause I was a boy but she was older so she argued she got first pick and she’s make me be _Storm_ ,” he mumbled, lips tilted vacantly. “How funny is that?”

Stiles bit his lip sadly, his chest filled with an almost crushing sensation of loss that he almost could’ve believed was transference if he didn’t already have a history of empathy. “She sounds like she was really cool,” he said softly, and Derek nodded, biting his lip as pain flickered in his eyes before he fixed a secret little smile on his face.

“She was the best big sister ever,” he said in a low voice, then looked back at Stiles. “C’mon, let’s see if they have World War Hulk.” He put a hand on Stiles’s back, guiding him down the aisle towards another area.

After a while looking around together, they separated to look at different things in the shop. Stiles was just looking through some Wonder Woman comics when a voice right behind him startled him. “You know, I always thought her invisible plane was kind of pointless.” Stiles turned around and blushed when the guy grinned at his jump. “I mean, she’s not invisible, so what’s the point of an invisible plane?”

Stiles smiled and nodded. “Very true. I mean, like a flying woman is any less noticeable, huh?” he asked.

The guy hesitated a minute, then grinned. “You don’t remember me, huh?” he asked, then waved a hand. “It’s cool,” he said, holding out his hand. “Adam,” he said, and Stiles nodded.

“Stiles, but you seem to-“

“High school,” Adam said, waving a hand. “It’s all understandable, trust me. We had some pretty weird high school years and we only had a few classes together.”

Stiles chuckled. “Yeah, sorry, I just don’t remember a lot of names,” he said with a shrug. “So, you stuck around or have you just not left yet?” he asked, trying to deflect from the ‘weird things’ discussion.

Adam shook his head. “Sticking around for now. You?”

Stiles nodded. “Yeah, I figured why cost my dad the money for college if I’m gonna just be a cop anyhow, you know?” he said with a dismissive wave of his hand. “It might be a waste, but Beacon Hills isn’t _that_ bad.”

Adam smirked. “It has its charms,” he said and Stiles barely managed not to blush when he realized what Adam was doing. He was _flirting_ … on _Stiles_. “Hey, this may be a little forward, but do you wanna go get something to eat? It’s gotta be close enough to lunch time,” Adam said and Stiles hesitated.

“Well, I’m kinda here with a friend,” Stiles said, glancing around to spot Derek.

Adam hummed. “Is that a for real ‘friend’ or am I barking up the wrong tree, or-“

“No, no, totally not the wrong tree,” Stiles giggled nervously. “Just- my friend and I are shopping today so the wrong time for that tree.”

Adam’s eyes lit up with interest and he nodded. “Can I call you sometime maybe?” he asked, and Stiles was taken aback by a chance at postponement. He tried to think of any reason _not_ to say yes and failed.

“Yeah, sure, lemme just- hold up- here.” Stiles handed him his phone, then took Adam’s so they could program in each other’s numbers. 

“Thanks,” Adam breathed as he took his phone back. He looked up and met Stiles’s eyes. “I’d really like to hang out sometime.”

Stiles couldn’t help the way his ears burned as he looked down, glancing up through his lashes. “I’d like that, I think,” he said, waving when Adam wandered off. When he looked up again to find Derek, he saw him standing across the room, but the rigid line of his should said all he needed to hear about what all Derek had heard. “Well shit,” he muttered, putting down the comic as he steeled himself to make it up to Derek. In the end, Derek didn’t even bring it up. 

However, it was clear their earlier light, cheeriness had diminished.

~

The following weekend was the first time Isaac and Scott were able to spend any real time at the house and, when they arrived to find Stiles and Derek on the couch reading, they both just stopped and stared. “Uh… what’s up?” Isaac asked, nudging Scott, glancing at Derek’s feet in Stiles’s lap and the relaxed manner at which Derek was flipping through a _comic book_.

Derek glanced up then looked back down. “Where’ve you two been?” he asked, looking disinterested in the answer.

Scott huffed. “Doing stuff. You don’t question Peter-“

“We don’t _want_ to know where Peter goes,” Stiles interrupted, smirking up at Scott and Isaac, wiggling his eyebrows. “Pretty sure we know exactly where you two get off to though,” he said, snickering at the eye roll Isaac gave him.

Derek frowned, looking over the top of his comic. “What do you mean ‘we know’? Is there something I should know?” he asked suspiciously. “I was just being polite-“

“Lies, you don’t know polite,” Stiles said, bouncing Derek’s feet with a grin. “You just don’t need an answer,” he said, curling his hand around Derek’s heel as he laid the comic on the knee Derek’s feet weren’t on to balance it.

Derek rolled his eyes, nudging his thigh. “No really though, what am I supposed to know?” he asked curiously.

Stiles looked up, eyebrow raised. “Uh, that Scott and Isaac are totally screwing and don’t want to come around smelling like it so they stay away a lot of the time? C’mon, it’s obvious.”

Derek shot them both a look, then snorted. “Well, now that I know what to look for it is, but you could’ve _told me_ ,” he glared at Stiles, who just flicked his toe. “Ow!” Derek whined, giving Stiles a playfully hurt look.

Stiles just grinned. “Shut up, you’re supposed to have better senses than me, if you didn’t notice by now you’re just unobservant,” he said simply. “I figured it was just one of those things we don’t talk about. Like Peter’s mysterious comings and goings that absolutely nobody wants to know about.”

Derek snorted. “My money is on stalking some poor woman in town. He’s always had this kinda ‘creepy’ vibe even when he wasn’t deranged.”

Stiles snorted. “So that’s genetic, huh? The creeper-in-the-shadows thing?” he asked, then looked up at Scott. “Dude, I never did tell you about how often he’d just loom in the shadows in my room until I noticed him and nearly pissed myself did I? You guys didn’t like each other so I never told you I was helping him just as much as you but yeah, he’d sneak in my window and just stand there watching me doing homework and shit until I looked up and had the life scared out of me.”

Derek smirked, looking back down at his comic. “Cause you look really funny when you’re startled,” he teased and Stiles rolled his eyes.

Isaac cleared his throat then went to sit in the chair by Derek’s end of the couch. “So… what did Stiles have to do to talk you into reading his comic books?” He leaned closer. “Is that _Hellboy_?” he asked, and Derek glowered.

“What’s wrong with Hellboy?”

Scott snickered when he flopped into the chair beside Stiles. “What did you use as blackmail to make him read comic books?” he asked and Stiles shot him a look.

“His idea, not mine,” he said, and they both looked at Derek in surprise.

Derek just grunted. “Shut up, I was a kid too, you know?”

Stiles patted his ankle. “Hey, Hellboy is awesome! You totally have the whole ‘sarcastic and witty’ thing in common with him!” He perked up. “Oh, dude, did you ever see the movie with Ron Perlman?” he asked and Derek nodded.

“Yeah, me and some friends from school went to see it. The second one freaked me out though,” he said, making a face. “How the hell did Liz get pregnant? I mean come on, overlooking the ‘demon’ and ‘pyrokinetic human’ biology not matching, there’s the whole… size thing.”

Stiles just barked out a laugh, doubling over as he caught the look on Derek’s face. “Oh my God, you totally tried to imagine the laws of physics there, huh?” he asked and Derek rolled his eyes.

“It’s just true, Stiles. I mean really, that’s really a horrific thought,” he muttered, looking back down at his book, though it didn’t hide the way his ears turned red.

Stiles nudged his feet. “I feel inclined to point out that you are an actual embodiment of breaking the law of conservation of mass. You actually gain like eight inches and fifty pounds when you go into your full alpha form from nowhere. Pretty sure you have no argument about comic book physics when you break real world physics yourself,” he teased.

Derek just rolled his eyes. “Whatever, just shut up and read,” he muttered, kicking at Stiles’s leg halfheartedly.

Isaac made a face. “Okay who are you and what did you do with Derek Hale?” he asked, and Scott nodded.

“We’re gone a week and it’s like you’re… a normal dude.”

Stiles glanced over at Derek, who met his eyes, then smiled, looking back down. “Well it helps we’ve gone into town every day this week for Derek’s ‘blend in with the humans’ training,” he said and Derek snorted. “Shut it, you! It’s working!” He grinned up at the others. “Dude, Derek has like serious opinions on Marvel comics. How cool is that?!” he asked. He held up a finger. “He reads mystery stories, he hates _sodas_ , he is capable of more than just working out and brooding, and he likes to steal people’s fries,” he said, glaring at Derek playfully.

“Well, nobody bothered trying to get to know me as a person after I showed up here,” Derek mumbled. “It’s easy to lose yourself when you’re always thinking about keeping your pack alive.”

Stiles smiled comfortingly. “It’s okay, dude. We don’t blame you, you know? You’ve done the best job you can at this ‘alpha’ thing. Can’t fault you for letting it consume you.” He met Derek’s’ eyes and saw the gratitude there. “C’mon, it’s just me and you and Peter most days and Peter’s not going to bring out the ‘young guy that has actual interests’ in you. I’m already Isaac’s nurturer, I may as well look after everybody,” he joked and Isaac grinned.

“You’re totally my surrogate mom, even if you’re an eighteen year old boy,” he teased.

Scott snorted. “My real mom doesn’t fuss over me as much as you do, Stiles. Out of all of us, you’ll be the best dad someday,” he said, and then froze when it hit him.

Stiles, however, just let his gaze fall to his lap, looking at the words on the page without really seeing them. He could sense Isaac’s confusion but he couldn’t look up because more than anything, he felt the waves of guilt coming off of Derek. Stiles was so tempted to get up and go be somewhere alone for a little while, but the guilt Derek felt would only multiply if he showed how hard the reminder of their situation hit him, so he stayed put. He fixed a smile on his face and curled his hand around Derek’s ankle, stroking at the bone on the inside of his ankle comfortingly. “Yeah, maybe,” he said to Scott, whose apologetic eyes didn’t leave his. Stiles just shook his head, smiling sadly as he looked back at his comic and they all fell silent.

~

When Stiles started hanging out with Adam, it wasn’t a ‘dating’ thing. They were just hanging out. However, he still couldn’t bear to say to Derek’s face where he was really going. He knew Derek knew. Derek knew Stiles knew he knew. But he still lied and said he was going to his house because he didn’t want to hurt Derek more than he already did with the whole ‘mates’ thing. Even if they weren’t dating, he liked Adam and he knew Adam liked him, so he knew that seeing him upset Derek. Derek had told him dating was fine as long as he kept it away from Derek, so Stiles wasn’t going to deny himself a new friend with the potential of it being more someday. It just hurt to know he was hurting Derek. 

In the months since becoming a werewolf, especially after everybody started college, Stiles had spent more time with Derek than any of the others. He had gotten to learn things about Derek he was pretty sure nobody else knew. They were surprisingly good at being friends in a way that Stiles hadn’t anticipated. He hated to know he could hurt Derek worse than anybody because he was pretty sure he was the one who cared the most about Derek’s feelings.

Stiles knew his luck would run out one day. 

Stiles was just watching a movie with Adam, there was nothing going on, but they were laying on his bed with the laptop on their knees, pressed together from shoulder to knee so they could both see, when there was a knock at his bedroom door. “Yeah?” he called, expecting his father. However, when the door opened, Derek walked in. Stiles sat up quickly, trying to put some space between him and Adam, but Derek froze, blinking. “Shit, Derek! Hey!” he tried quickly.

Derek just blinked, jaw clenching when he looked at Adam and then at Stiles. “Sorry, I’ll- I’ll call you later.” He turned and slipped out of the door too fast for Stiles to even think of getting up. 

Derek was gone before Stiles could follow and he just sat on the side of the bed listening to Derek’s steps as he ran all the way outside, leaving Stiles’s dad to shut the door behind him. Stiles’s groaned, falling back down beside Adam. “Shit.”

Adam nudged him. “So… was that Derek Hale?” he asked, and Stiles tensed.

“How do you know that?” he asked and Adam rolled his eyes.

“Small enough town to know all the gossip, duh.” He leaned back against the pillows. “So… what’s the story?”

Stiles cringed. “Long story, but he’s a friend, kind of.”

Adam hummed. “Just a friend or…” His eyes flickered to the bed between them and then back to Stiles.

Stiles flushed. “Wow yeah, no, just friends. I’m single, you know this,” he said, and Adam shrugged.

“Hey, could’ve been an ex.” He looked up, meeting Stiles’s eyes. “He’s not an ex, right? Cause if he is, I really might wanna rethink what I’m about to do.”

Stiles frowned slightly. “What are you about to-“ Stiles stopped when Adam leaned in, hesitating with a breath between them, waiting for Stiles to move, before closing the gap. Stiles gasped slightly against Adam’s lips and Adam pressed closer, deepening the kiss. Stiles couldn’t help the soft sound he made as Adam cupped his face, tilting his head. Stiles parted his lips and was rewarded by Adam sucking his top lip between his teeth, nibbling at it in a way that sent shivers down his spine.

When the kiss broke, Stiles couldn’t help but smile. “Knew you liked me,” he teased and Adam laughed, his brown eyes sparkling. 

“Well, you’re cute, I couldn’t help myself,” Adam said, pecking his lips again. Stiles bit his lip, then leaned back tugging the laptop back onto their laps.

“Movie?” he asked, and Adam nodded, settling against Stiles. This time, however, he not-so-casually slid his arm around Stiles’s shoulders, settling in comfortably. Stiles sighed and leaned his head on Adam’s shoulder, thinking about what Derek might ask him later.

~

The next day, Derek didn’t say anything all morning while they sat around watching TV. It took Stiles giving up on Derek bringing it up himself to steel his resolve. “Alright.” Stiles turned off the TV then turned to face Derek. “So, are we going to just ignore things and let it get worse again?” he asked, and Derek’s jaw clenched but he refused to look at Stiles. “No, Derek, look. We have to talk about things-“

“No, we really don’t!” Derek stood up and Stiles huffed, following him.

“Derek! Stop it. Talk to me damn it.” He followed him into the kitchen and got between Derek and the fridge. “Look, I know you hate using your words, but we have to-“

“No, we don’t!” Derek snapped. He sighed and stepped back, leaning against the counter. “Look, Stiles, talking isn’t going to fix this one, okay? It’s nobody’s fault, it’s nothing either of us can fix, so let’s just not.”

Stiles bit his lip. “Derek, I hate this,” he said softly. Derek met his eyes and Stiles swallowed hard at the _pain_ in Derek’s eyes. “I don’t want to hurt you-“

“I know that,” Derek said softly, voice gentler than usual. “But Stiles, you have to. You’re _always_ going to hurt me.” Stiles flinched and Derek’s mouth tightened into a line. “I know you hate hurting people. Since I met you, you’ve only ever tried to protect people. I’ve seen you risk your life for people you don’t even like. But the fact of how things are between us is that I fucked up, not you.” He shook his head. “You deserve to live as much of a normal life as you can and you like what’s-his-name so you should date him.”

Stiles smiled sadly. “Adam,” he supplied. He shook his head. “We’re not dating. We just hang out. Last night we were just watching a movie when you came by.”

Derek shrugged awkwardly. “You like him. Whatever you two do is none of my business. It’s my fault I came by, I should’ve called first,” he said simply. “I won’t do it again as long as you don’t come around me with him.” He cringed. “And, you know, don’t come around… after.”

Stiles chuckled weakly. “I wouldn’t anyways.” He let his head thump back against the fridge. “Okay,” he said softly, looking up at the ceiling. “This is how it has to be.” Derek nodded and Stiles smiled sadly. “Okay.” 

~

It wasn’t easy trying to date Adam. For one, Stiles didn’t want Adam over at his house after the Derek incident. Even if Derek promised to call before coming over again, he didn’t want to risk it. He also knew that having Adam in his house made the house smell like Adam and, while he was fine with it, he didn’t want Derek uncomfortable in his house. He also didn’t want to lose spending time with Derek every day, so he could only hang out with Adam at night and on the weekends when Scott and Isaac were around more so Derek didn’t slip into his ‘brooding alone’ thing again.

Because of this, Adam’s job interfered sometimes. He was a pizza delivery boy so he worked nights most often. They usually only got to hang out once or twice a week, and even then it wasn’t really ‘dating’. They would go get something to eat or go to the movies together. They even occasionally went to the high school’s football games a few times Adam had off Friday nights. Stiles’s dad knew Stiles and Adam were ‘dating’ but Stiles didn’t get the feeling he liked it. He never said anything about it, and Adam didn’t really come to the house anymore after the Derek incident, but his dad wasn’t stupid. A few times hanging out at the house and then a couple months going out a few times a week at night just the two of them didn’t scream ‘just friends’.

And they weren’t, there was definitely a non-platonic side to it, but they didn’t talk about anything about a ‘relationship’ or ‘boyfriends’ so Stiles just thought of it as him and Adam hanging out together. Stiles liked it well enough. He just really worried a lot of the time that by some horrible combination of bad luck they would end up in the same restaurant or something as Derek. He knew Derek was in love with him. He had been since maybe even before the second full moon. Stiles didn’t want to hurt Derek more than he had to, and he knew that if Derek saw him and Adam together it would make him have that look in his eyes, that shadow that settled and took away the glimmer of happiness that Stiles had become used to. 

Stiles should’ve known that it would just so happen that the same night he and Adam went to get coffee, the rest of the pack – or at least the ones not going to pick up Lydia and Allison from the airport for Thanksgiving break - would decide on pre-dinner coffee too. 

They had just walked back out to the car when Adam caught Stiles by his scarf and tugged him into a kiss. Stiles grinned and put his hot chocolate on top of the car, pulling Adam in to kiss him more firmly. “You taste like cinnamon,” Stiles said, leaning back against the car, letting Adam press him back against the side of the jeep.

Adam chuckled, kissing him slowly and deeply, his cold fingers sliding into Stiles’s hair. When he pulled back he moaned softly. “You taste like chocolate and whipped cream,” he said bad, nosing Stiles’s head to the side. Stiles closed his eyes, groaning when Adam bit down particularly hard, just how he liked it.

“Fuck, Adam,” he groaned, gasping when Adam sucked at the spot he had just bit.

Adam chuckled, licking over his mark. “Maybe this time you’ll actually bruise for me,” he mumbled, fingers sliding under Stiles’s jacket and shirt, thumb pressing into his hipbone as he bit at the same spot again. Stiles panted, one hand tangled in Adam’s hair. He didn’t even care they were in a parking lot and anybody could drive past, it felt so good.

Or he didn’t care, until he heard a soft, distant gasp and someone mumble his name. A second later Stiles breathed in and smelt Scott’s shampoo first of all. He thought of ignoring Scott, but then he realized he wasn’t alone. The second he caught Derek’s scent, he tried to pull away from Adam, but before he could do more than push at Adam’s hips, he sensed more than heard the second Adam spotted them. Adam pulled away, frowning, but Stiles didn’t even notice because he looked across the parking lot and saw Derek and Scott standing outside the coffee shop, staring. He swallowed hard, fighting a wave of panic as he saw Scott’s horrified face. He forced himself to drag his eyes up to meet Derek’s and something inside of him _shattered_.

Derek looked like someone had stabbed him in the heart. His shocked, hurt expression was bad, but Stiles could see the _pain_ in his eyes from all the way across the parking lot. Everything about Derek’s face read hurt and Stiles could _feel_ the pain radiating from Derek like waves crashing over him. His own chest constricted at the painfully fast thudding of Derek’s heart. “No,” Stiles whispered, because he didn’t want it.

He never wanted to see Derek hurt so bad. He _never_ wanted Derek to hurt that way. Derek looked like his world was collapsing and Stiles wanted nothing more than to stop it and make everything better. Everything inside of him screamed ‘fix it’ but he knew there was nothing he could do. There was nothing he could say or do to stop Derek’s heart from breaking because the one thing he’d tried so hard to avoid – letting Derek see him with someone else with his own eyes – was happening and he hated himself.

Adam looked up and saw Scott and Derek, then glanced at Stiles. “Oh yeah, you’re friends, right?” he asked, then turned and waved politely.

Stiles, however, turned to look at Adam, flinching. “We need to go,” he said softly, turning to grab his cup and then rush to the driver’s seat. He spared one glanced back and saw that Derek was gone and Scott was left standing alone.

When Adam got in, Stiles pulled out of the lot, fingers tapping on the wheel. Adam just stared at him, looking confused and a little annoyed. “What was that?” he finally asked, and Stiles gritted his teeth.

“Nothing-“

“Seemed like something,” Adam urged and Stiles huffed.

“I just… I didn’t want anybody to see us,” he said, then cringed when he realized that sounded. “No, Adam-“

“Wow, _wow_ ,” Adam started, glaring. “Seriously?! What, are you not out? Is that why you don’t want me going to your house anymore?! Worried your dad will see? You could’ve said something-“

“It’s not that,” Stiles admitted reluctantly. “I just didn’t want someone to see. It isn’t anybody as in the town, it’s a certain someone and that was not okay at all.”

Adam narrowed his eyes. “It’s Derek isn’t it?” he asked and Stiles hesitated. “You said he was ‘just a friend’,” he accused and Stiles grumbled.

“He is. He only ever has been. It’s just… I don’t want him to see me with anybody,” he said softly. “It’s a long story, and one I’m not willing to tell.”

Adam slammed his hand on his thigh. “Damn it, you like him, don’t you?! That’s why you freaked out when he came to your house that time. You like him and you don’t want him knowing you’re off the market.”

Stiles laughed humorlessly. “Not exactly. Besides, since when am I off the market? We’ve never talked about anything between us, Adam,” he pointed out, gesturing between them. “Is there even an ‘us’?”

Adam made a face. “Well, yeah? Maybe nothing _serious_ but you seemed skittish so I was giving you space and time and shit. Although maybe I shouldn’t have.” He crossed his arms. “Bet Derek Hale isn’t the type to give someone space. Maybe you like unhinged and posessive,” he sniped and Stiles frowned.

“Wait, what?” he asked, and Adam shot him a look. “No really-“

“Well didn’t Derek Hale stalk these two kids when we were in high school? He was always waiting around like a freak for them. He picked them up and drove them to school and showed up whenever they started to go home with somebody else and followed them and shit.” Adam shrugged. “Just saying.”

Stiles stared at him at the stop sign before taking off. “Dude… Derek was friends with them. He helped them. He drove them around to keep them safe-“

“Oh sure, he kept them safe, right. Why did they both end up dead within a few months of each other our junior year then?” Adam demanded. “Everybody knew he killed them. Just nobody knew for sure so they couldn’t report him. Although, not shocking. One was a loser and the other was an ugly chick-“

Stiles slammed on the brakes, fighting down his claws as he turned to Adam, rage in his eyes. “Get the fuck out of my jeep,” he snarled and Adam gaped.

“What?! It’s another six blocks to my house!” Adam cried and Stiles swallowed hard, fighting tears of anger and a little pain.

“The people you’re talking about were my _friends_ ,” he hissed. “Boyd wasn’t a freak, he was just _quiet_.” He swallowed around a whimper and shook his head. “And Erica was fucking _beautiful_ ,” he spat through clenched teeth. “Erica and Boyd were just misunderstood kids, they weren’t freaks. They were kids who got in trouble and Derek tried to _help them_ and the still died and don’t you ever blame him for anything like that ever again,” he swore, fighting waves of red-hot anger that he had never actually felt before.

Adam just stared, looking a little scared. “Stiles-“

“GET OUT NOW!” Stiles roared, closing his hands to hide the way his claws had come out. He only hoped that in the dark, as Adam jumped out and scrambled back, that he hadn’t seen his fangs or eyes. However, Stiles didn’t wait around to see as he drove off.

~

When Stiles got home, he immediately called Scott. He paced his bedroom, chewing on his nails as he waited for Scott to answer. It took a bit longer than usual before Scott answered. “Stiles? What’s up?”

Stiles sighed. “You know what’s up, Scott,” he said weakly. “Is he okay?” he asked, voice tight.

Scott chuckled softly. “He will be. He wasn’t prepared for that so it- it hit him hard. He wouldn’t even talk the drive back here. I’m actually thinking about leaving because his mood is really bringing me down. Nobody else is here, Isaac and Peter went to go get Lydia and Allison from the airport.”

Stiles flopped across his bed. “Fuck my life. Seriously. Why?!” He whined into the covers. “Scott, make it better,” he whimpered, voice muffled by the bedspread.

“Dude, Derek will be okay. Trust me, this is far from the worst he’s bounced back from. It sucks a lot, but he’ll be fine,” Scott said, then hesitated. “You knew this would happen.”

Stiles rolled onto his back. “He was never supposed to see me with someone else. That was never going to happen. He’s going to know, but he shouldn’t have to see me with anybody else. I felt his pain and wanted to _die_ , Scott,” he confessed.

Scott made a confused sound. “Wait, you _felt his pain_? Dude, I couldn’t feel his pain and I was right beside him.”

Stiles pouted. “Lucky you.” He groaned angrily. “Then fucking Adam. Gah, he freaked out and started talking shit about Derek and brought up how ‘didn’t he kill those two kids when we were in high school, the loser and the ugly chick’-“

“SHUT UP!” Scott cried in shock and Stiles laughed weakly.

“Nope. I saw red. I was already pissed at the calling Derek names, but saying he killed Erica and Boyd… God, Scott, it hurt so bad,” he whispered. “I started crying but I was so angry I’m not sure if I was sad or just pissed. I had to hide my hands and hope he couldn’t see my teeth and eyes when I yelled for him to get out. I _roared_ ,” he admitted. “I wolfed out once he was gone and totally ripped my freaking seat covers. It sucks a lot.”

Scott made a soft sound. “Stiles… You know the thing about feeling that Derek was hurt. That’s not- I didn’t feel that,” he said. “Like at all. I’m not sure why you felt his pain unless it’s just the whole ‘empathy’ thing you do really good.”

Stiles frowned. “Wait, really? It wasn’t just empathy or guilt, Scott. I figured… I don’t know, I figured it was a thing. He’s our alpha. I can sense other emotions you guys have. I can tell when you guys are angry or sad or happy or something. Why wouldn’t I feel pain?”

“No, you can sense them, I can sense them, but _feeling_ them, sharing an emotion, that’s not something the rest of us have done,” Scott pointed out. “Sure it’s not just you being a really tender hearted guy?”

Stiles huffed. “I can’t help I’m emotional,” he said, then sighed. “But no, like I honestly could feel his pain. It was kind of intense. Like, when his heart started racing, my chest hurt like hell,” he explained.

“Holy _crap_!” Scott whispered. “Dude, okay, so don’t freak… but um… so do you happen to maybe love him?” he asked and Stiles snorted.

“What? He’s- I mean kind of?” he admitted awkwardly. “But it’s not like the mate thing. Just a ‘you’re my friend and I care about you’ kinda thing. Mostly.” Stiles closed his eyes. “I just want him to be okay. I hate hurting him. It’s terrible. I don’t like this at all. I wanted to die, Scott,” he whispered. “I could feel his heart breaking and I wanted to just die because I did it to him and he doesn’t deserve it, Scott. He’s been hurt so many times by so many people and I don’t want him to hurt because of me, too.” Stiles blinked as his eyes burned. “I’m supposed to be there for him. I’m supposed to take care of him. Instead I just hurt him more than anybody.”

Scott chuckled. “Stiles, are you hearing yourself? He’s the alpha, it’s his burden and his responsibility to handle tough shit-“

Stiles sat up with a grumble. “He’s my _mate_! I’m supposed to share that burden with him. Not put even more on his shoulders to deal with!”

“SEE!” Scott said loudly. “You just called him _your_ mate! Stiles, you’re supposed to be his mate, nobody said he has to be yours too, you know? Unless you want him, he’s not your mate, Stiles. That’s how this mate thing works. You never claimed him, you don’t want to be stuck with him, so he’s not your mate, he’s just your alpha.”

Stiles stood up slowly, mind racing. “Shit,” he muttered, rubbing a hand over his face. Because to Stiles, Derek was his mate. He had thought of him as such for a long time. He knew that Scott was right, Derek was just his alpha, anything else was his choice, but he’d already taken to thinking of Derek as _his_. In Stiles’s mind, they were something _together_. They weren’t a couple. They weren’t dating. They were just friends, but they were a team. Everything in Stiles thought of them as a pair. He had never thought of what they were a pair _of_ , but when things happened – granted, lately ‘things’ meant the dishwasher breaking or his car having a flat – Stiles was there to help Derek. Hell, Derek didn’t seem _happy_ so Stiles took him out and made him find things to make him happy. Stiles worked with Derek when nobody else bothered and just expected him to handle it. They were a team, and in Stiles’s heart and mind they were _mates_. Stiles put a hand over his mouth, then lowered it slowly. “Scott… Scott, he’s _my_ mate. I take care of him. I go out of my way to make him happier. I wanted to die when I felt how bad he was hurting, and I wanted to rip Adam’s head off when he called Derek a freak even if I’ve done the same because-“ He took a breath, fighting a surprised smile. “Because he’s _mine_.”

Scott laughed. “Dude, is this you realizing you’re in love with him? Cause it’s kind of freaking hilarious.”

Stiles turned and grabbed his keys off the desk. “Scott, is Derek home?” he asked, shrugging on his jacket.

“Yeah, I’m outside here, he’s just upstairs-“

“YOU’RE TALKING TO ME FROM IN THE HOUSE?!” Stiles cried, turning bright red. “Scott! Scott, he probably heard all of that, you dick!”

Scott made a sound. “Oh… shit. _Shit_ , sorry!” Scott hissed. “Um, okay so I’m going home, but call me if you need to talk. If you wanna call Derek, he’ll probably answer and the others aren’t home yet.”

Stiles was already in the jeep when he smiled nervously, and bit his lip. “Yeah, I’ll call him,” he said, then hung up and started the jeep. This wasn’t a conversation he wanted to have over the phone.

~

Stiles had just walked into the kitchen after kicking off his shoes by the door when he was grabbed around the waist and shoved against the counter, startling a gasp out of him when the edge hit his back. “Wha-MMPH!” He was silenced by Derek’s mouth on his, biting at his lips in a way that was almost too painful to be pleasurable. “Derek!” he gasped, pulling back to breathe. Derek growled low in his throat, eyes red as he slid his hand from Stiles’s shirt up to his throat, pushing his head to the side so he could see the tiny red bite mark still lingering along Stiles’s throat. “Shit,” Stiles gasped, remembering Adam biting his neck. He thought it would’ve healed by then.

Derek made a low noise and curled his palm around Stiles’s neck, covering the bite with is hand. “Tell me to stop, Stiles,” Derek breathed, clearly fighting himself. “If you say ‘no’ I’ll stop. Just tell me to stop,” he gritted out, trailing his hand up into Stiles’s hair as he leaned down and nuzzled along his throat, erasing the scent of another man with his own. “Stop me or I won’t be able to, Stiles. Not after hearing you call me yours. Please,” he whimpered. “You have to say it-“

“I- I can’t,” Stiles whimpered, a shiver running down his spine. He was overwhelmed, he had never expected _this_ , but he was so turned on he didn’t know how to think straight. “ _God_ , Derek-“

Derek growled against his throat, nails digging into the back of his neck as he trailed the tip of his tongue down the tendon of Stiles’s neck until he met the collar of his shirt. “Say ‘no’ so I can stop-“

“Oh God, _don’t stop_ ,” Stiles whimpered, only to cry out when Derek hoisted him up onto the counter and _sucked and nibbled_ on his throat, clearly getting on board with erasing Adam’s mark. 

Derek whined in his throat, high and desperate, hand sliding up Stiles’s shirt. “Off, it smells like him, get it off-“

Stiles pulled back and reached for the buttons only to gasp when Derek’s eyes flashed red and he _ripped_ the shirt open and shoved it roughly off of Stile’s arms, nearly yanking Stiles off the counter with the cuff caught on his wrist as he snatched it and threw it away. “Holy crap,” Stiles whimpered, yelping slightly when he was yanked back against Derek by his thighs, Derek’s claws starting to sharpen as he dug his fingertips into Stiles’s legs in his attempt to rub all over Stiles. “Derek- Derek if you keep wiggling all up on me like that-“ He was cut off with a hard kiss and he groaned. He fumbled with Derek’s shirt and pulled it up, glaring until Derek obligingly raised his arms and let Stiles pull it off and toss it over his head.

Derek kissed Stiles hungrily and then tilted his head back, letting Stiles get at his neck and chest, damn near grinning at how desperate to touch him Stiles was. He wasted no time yanking Stiles’s belt open. Stiles scrambled with his own pants, both of them bumping wrists and hands into each other clumsily in a frantic rush to get a hand down the other’s pants. Just when Stiles finally got Derek’s erection out of his pants and took one good look at him, Derek yanked him in by the legs, pressing their naked flesh together, and then hefted him off the counter, kissing him hard when Stiles squeaked and scrabbled for purchase with his arms around Derek’s neck. They stood biting hard, rough kisses into each other’s mouths as they found their balance, Stiles clinging tight to Derek as Derek ground their hips together with the hold he hand on Stiles’s ass, so that Stiles was mostly clinging to him as he rocked up and down. “Holy he-ELL!” Stiles cried out, startled as they suddenly lurched.

Derek stumbled back, then spun them around and slammed Stiles against the wall. Stiles grunted in pain, but shook his head when Derek hesitated, diving in to kiss him hard, nails digging into his shoulders. “Stiles, unnngh, _Stiles_!” Derek panted, thrusting against Stiles, who had nowhere to go as he was trapped between Derek’s body and the wall he was pinned against. Stiles tightened his legs around Derek with each rock, grinding their bodies together even harder. 

Stiles couldn’t breathe or see straight or even _think_. His and Derek’s erections were trapped between their stomachs and Derek writhing against him was somehow too much and not quite enough at the same time. “Derek, Derek I need- Oh!” He whined when Derek ducked down and scraped his teeth across Stiles’s nipple. “Lemme just-“ He tried to slide a hand between them but Derek shook his head, pressing their bodies flush again.

“No time, no- no time- _God_ ,” he growled, biting down on Stiles’s neck and shoulder right where his claim had been. I sent a shudder down Stiles’s spine so pleasurable it bordered on pain. “Wanna fuck you so bad but I-“

Stiles kissed him. “Definitely no time,” he agreed, breath catching as he leaned his head back and held onto Derek.

“No, no look at me,” Derek panted, leaning up to nip at Stile’s chin until he tipped his lips back down. Derek pulled back enough to grind harder against Stiles, looking into his eyes. “Keep looking at me, I wanna- wanna see you.”

Stiles whimpered and cursed. “Derek, oh _God_!” He hit his head against the wall then looked back down. He looked down into Derek’s blue-green eyes – the red had receded – and couldn’t look away, both of them oddly silent apart from their hard, panting breaths like they were running a marathon. Stiles dipped his head and Derek leaned up enough that their lips brushed, catching slightly as they were damp from their hot, moist breaths, but never meeting as they mostly panted into each other’s faces, eyes locked in an _intense_ game of ‘who will look away first’. 

Stiles was the one to break their long gaze, but only because the mounting pleasure was building so high he felt like his eyes were going to explode as he fought to not look away, only to reach a point of almost pain, his body strung so tight that he could only clench his eyes shut and whine between his teeth before the wave finally crested and his eyes flew wide, mouth opening in a silent scream as he came, eyes locked with Derek’s as his orgasm slammed into him so hard the world narrowed to the pleasure coursing through his body and Derek’s bright, _beautiful_ eyes. When he finally choked on a breathe, lungs burning from not breathing through a long, _intense_ orgasm he could’ve never even dreamed of before, he let his head fall back, thumping against the wall hard.

“No, no, Stiles, I need your eyes,” Derek gasped, thrusting and grinding hard, his dick sliding through the mess Stiles had made between their bodies. “Stiles- uh _Stiles_!” Stiles fought a wave of dizziness, still floating higher than anything had ever took him before, and looked down, going limp in Derek’s hold, hands weakly cupping his face and neck.

“You’re so fucking amazing, Derek,” Stiles breathed weakly. “So beautiful, so perfect. God look at you,” he whispered, entranced by the fire in Derek’s eyes. “Come for me, Derek.” It was a command, not a request, and Stiles could see how desperately Derek wanted to follow his command. Stiles leaned their foreheads together, kissing him lightly, just a delicate brush of lips, before whispering against them. “Imagine how I’ll smell covered in your come.”

That was all it took for Derek to let out a choked cry, thrusting hard against Stiles a few times, sobbing out an almost pained sound of pleasure before his rocking slowed to a stop. Stiles felt himself start to slip and he clung to Derek, who just staggered back a step and dropped almost as if in slow motion so that their fall to earth was mostly gentle, Derek rolling from feet to ass to back and Stiles landing with his knees on the floor and his body flush against Derek, head on his chest.

They lay together, both body’s shaking violently from the pleasure still coursing through their veins. Stiles let out a broken laugh, face tucked into Derek’s neck. “Derek, you missed your calling,” he managed shakily and Derek grunted inquiringly. “You should’ve been a porn star.”

Derek chuckled weakly. “Stiles,” he started, but he was too busy trying to not shake apart to finish.

Stiles grinned, curling himself into Derek’s chest more. “No, really, I’m pretty sure never has there ever been a porno hotter than what you just were.” He frowned. “What you were? How you- Derek, words aren’t working,” he muttered and Derek grinned against his hair, curling his arms around Stiles.

“Oh God, nothing shuts you up, it’s official,” he panted lightly, holding Stiles close.

Stiles wiggled back a little to look up at Derek, only for them both to hiss as their oversensitive skin got friction rom the movement. “I’m serious, dude. I’ll never be able to look at you again without thinking about your orgasm face. I’m ruined for all other men now!” Derek couldn’t help a pleased rumble at this announcement. “Your sex noises are all I’ll be able to think about every time you speak-“

“Good God, do you never stop talking?!” Derek whined, pouting at Stiles. “Please? Please just stop making me try to understand words. Stiles, my brain doesn’t work yet, try again later,” he pleaded and Stiles just smirked, earning a suspicious look.

Stiles leaned in and kissed Derek lightly. “Sorry, you’re booked up for ‘later’,” he said, lifting up enough to slide his hand through the mess on their stomachs, trailing his fingers up the ridges of Derek’s abs. “After we shower,” he started, lowering his lips to skate along the rim of Derek’s ear, earning a whine and a shiver. “You’re gonna fuck me,” he said in a hoarse, demanding tone that made Derek actually whimper.

“ _Fuck_ \- Stiles!” he groaned, only to stop and go still before lifting his hips some to see if Stiles had _really_ just ‘reacted’ a little bit, then turning his head to raise an eyebrow at Stiles. “ _Seriously_?!” he asked incredulously and Stiles smirked, kissing him so hard and sloppily that Derek almost forgot hot to speak.

“I’m not quite nineteen yet, Derek, what do you think?” he asked, then sat up, peeling them apart before the mess between them could dry and get too sticky. He sat back on Derek’s thighs, looking down at Derek’s ruined jeans and his flaccid cock lying in the mess all over Derek’s middle. He tucked himself in and pulled his pants fully back up on his hips, then stopped, sliding his fingers through the cooling mess on his stomach before thoughtlessly raising his finger to his lips, sucking his finger into his mouth when he couldn’t help his curiosity.

Derek, however, groaned and grabbed at his hips. “Jesus Christ, Stiles,” he whined and Stiles looked up to meet his eyes as his finger popped free of his lips. Derek sat up and kissed him hard, hands gripping at Stiles’s ass as he pulled him close while he chased the taste of them off of Stiles’s tongue. “You’re going to kill me,” Derek panted when he pulled back.

Stiles just smirked, then stood up, patting Derek’s head as he turned, hips swaying on his way out of the kitchen. “Wanna save water?” he asked, throwing a smile over his shoulder before he disappeared into the hall. 

He only got as far as the second step before he heard cursing and feet following him upstairs.

~

Stiles couldn’t stop smiling. He lay facing Derek, who wasn’t asleep, though his eyes were shut as he lazily stroked his thumb along Stiles’s skin, hand resting on his hip. After the kitchen, they had showered together. Neither of them could stop touching one another as they showered, sharing kisses and smiles and caresses. Stiles shivered happily at the memory of Derek sliding to his knees and blowing Stiles while jerking off, resting his cheek against Stiles’s stomach until he got himself off as well. He was pretty sure none of his dirtiest fantasies had prepared him for that.

Stiles made a soft sound when Derek slid his hand down and thumbed at the bruise lingering from Derek biting when he came. He narrowed his eyes at Derek, who opened his eyes and smirked. “I can hear you thinking,” he offered, and Stiles grinned, leaning in to kiss him.

“I can always hear you thinking, too.” He reached up and stroked Derek’s cheek, fingers catching on the stubble that had left red spots all over him. He was glad the stubble burn faded fast at least. His eyes softened and he tapped at Derek’s temple. “Even when you don’t realize it, I always know when you’re trapped in here, Derek.”

Derek’s eyes grew more serious and he swallowed. “I couldn’t work it out. I could never work out how you always know when I need you to distract me.” He snorted softly. “I’ve never got you, Stiles. You have frustrated me from the start cause you always surprise me.”

Stiles smiled weakly. “Like tonight, huh?” Derek flinched, eyes closing off in a cold mask. “No,” Stiles whispered, stroking the frown off his face. “Are we going to talk about it?”

Derek sighed weakly, lingering pain showing in his eyes. “I have a feeling you’re going to make me.”

Stiles giggled, nodding. “You do know me!” He sobered up and slid the last few inches to Derek’s front, pressing himself against Derek from chest to hips, legs tangling with Derek’s as he kissed his forehead. “I cannot tell you how sorry I am that tonight happened.”

Derek tensed and looked up at Stiles with hurt eyes. “But…” he trailed off and Stiles blinked, then glowered, slapping at Derek’s shoulder.

“ _No_ you asshole!” He growled, eyes flashing gold. “Not that part, you are _mine_ and having you to myself is probably the best thing ever to happen to me,” he said so strongly it left no doubt in Derek’s mind. His eyes faded to their normal color and his voice softened. “I meant you seeing me with Adam.”

Derek flinched. “That was… horrible,” he mumbled, turning his head, pressing his face into Stiles’s neck. “So terrible, Stiles. It hurt so bad. It was like having my insides ripped out right in front of me. I didn’t know it would be that bad.”

Stiles closed his eyes, pressing his lips to Derek’s head. “I know. I could feel it myself.” Derek pulled back in surprise, and Stiles nodded, stroking his fingers through Derek’s short hair. “When I looked at your face, even all the way across the lot, I could feel your pain. It felt like something was crushing my chest when your heart was beating that fast. I wanted to scream because I hurt you so badly that I could feel it myself.” He sighed. “Then Adam, that bastard, he started talking shit about you and I had to kick him out of the car before I wolfed out on him.”

Derek made a happy grumble. “Good,” he said, nuzzling along the side of Stile’s face. “Mine,” he mumbled happily and Stiles grinned, pecking his lips.

“Yep, mine too.” He looked into Derek’s eyes, noses rubbing together. “So… I’m assuming from the whole sex!attack thing that you heard the rest of my phone call with Scott The Moron?”

Derek smirked. “Nope, I just finally reached the end of my rope and, in my broken heart, knew that you would be receptive to frantic sex,” he joked, then nodded, raising his hand to curl around Stiles’s face, palm pressing against his cheek. “I’m glad I heard it because knowing everything that happened, knowing how you felt, knowing that I was going to be able to breathe again after nearly falling apart from the pain of seeing my mate with someone else… it was good,” he said with a small grin. “Granted, I really did plan on us talking, I swear.” He blushed slightly. “I just couldn’t help it. You called me _yours_ and I was pacing, I was gonna talk to you, but then you came in the room and I could smell him on you and couldn’t help it. I _had_ to have you right there.”

Stiles grinned, pecking is lips. “No complaints here-“ He was interrupted by his phone ringing. He reached out to grab it just in time for Derek to frown, sitting up on his elbows as he looked at the floor. Stiles answered Lydia’s call with a smile. “Hey, you guys coming over tonight or tomorrow?” he started.

“Well,” Lydia started, and Stiles looked at the floor where Derek was looking because he could hear her downstairs. Suddenly he realized they had missed the others arriving, too busy talking. “I’m already here, and could you explain why even us with human noses can smell that the kitchen smells like sex?!” she demanded.

Derek and Stiles shared looks before Derek slapped a hand over his mouth and fought immature snickers. He flopped back against the pillows and rolled, pressing his lips to Stiles’s shoulder, sliding an arm around his middle. Stiles just smirked, stretching as he sat up, leaning on the headboard. “Well, the good news is I’m not a virgin anymore,” he said smugly and Derek sat up on his elbows, staring at him in surprise.

“You were a _virgin_?!” he asked, and Stiles raised an eyebrow, shooting him a ‘no shit’ look.

“The bad news,” Stiles continued, snickering. “Is that I may or may not have lost my virginity in the kitchen,” he said, and Derek snorted, rolling over to lay face down, laughing into the pillow.

Lydia gasped. “YOU LOST WHAT IN WHERE?! Oh my GOD that is so unsanitary! Holy shit, please say it wasn’t on the counter or the table!”

Stiles heard various cries of, “What?” “Did he say what I think he said?!” and “Oh my God!” over the phone and without the need. Beside him, Derek was laughing hysterically into the pillows in a way that made Stiles worried he was having a mental breakdown or something.

“Nah, no unsanitary stuff, nobody eats off a wall or the floor and nothing got on any surfaces other than skin, somebody can just open a window or something,” Stiles dismissed.

“Wait, does that mean Mom and Dad are together now?” he heard Isaac asked facetiously and he huffed.

“Tell Isaac I’m not his mother and Derek’s not his father,” he said, and Lydia laughed. Derek snorted beside him and Stiles gave him a worried glance. “Right, well, we’re kinda upstairs so we’ll be down in a little while. I think I might’ve broke Derek though, so I need to fix him,” he said, then tossed his phone on the table when he hung up. He reached out and rubbed Derek’s shoulder. “Derek? You okay?”

Derek’s head popped up and Stiles was taken aback by how _young_ Derek’s bright, happy grin was. “I’ve literally never been better,” he said in a small, pleased tone. He sat up on his knees and leaned over, kissing Stiles hard, before sliding off the bed. “My pack is home, my mate is with me, and I just found out I was his first.”

Stiles huffed. “You know, the whole ‘placing value on virginity’ thing is really stupid and archaic. I shouldn’t be of more value because you ‘got me first’,” he said with a pointed glare.

Derek’s smile softened and he walked around the side of the bed, pulling his jeans over his hips. “You misunderstand me,” he said, sitting down beside Stiles. He leaned in and kissed him softly, holding his face in his hands. “It isn’t like I would love you any less or have wanted you any less if you were going out and having sex with people all the time,” he said, and Stiles’s breath caught on the word ‘love’ because neither of them had said it yet. He looked into Stiles’s eyes. “It’s because I thought you and _that guy_ were having sex and you deserved your first time to be with someone that loves you, not a guy who didn’t appreciate what he had.”

Stiles’s frown softened into a smile and his heart warmed until he felt like he was glowing from the inside out. “You sappy loser,” he whispered, then kissed Derek slowly. “Okay, I can allow that kind of ‘happy you were my first’,” he said and Derek smiled.

“Good.” Derek cringed. “Trust me, regretting sex isn’t a fun thing. Hopefully you won’t regret us.”

Stiles chuckled. “I’m the luckiest person alive, are you kidding?! My mate is a secret geek with the most beautiful face and the hottest body in the world. You are the living embodiment of every fantasy I ever could’ve had that didn’t involve Lydia Martin.” He pecked Derek’s lips. “C’mon, it’s been a long time since we had the whole pack together,” he said, and Derek nodded, standing up to finish getting dressed while Stiles did the same.

~

Stiles ran down the stairs and threw out his arms. “You’re home!” he cried, hugging Allison, who was nearest.

She yelped and laughed as they spun around. “Stiles! Man, I missed you,” she said, kissing his cheek. She let him go and he held his arms out to Lydia, who just crossed her arms.

“I’m not hugging someone who had sex in the _kitchen_ ,” she huffed primly.

Stiles snorted. “Too bad,” he said, then scooped her up, making her yell at him as he hugged her, her feet dangling off the ground. “Eurgh, I missed you so much,” he groaned, setting her back down so that he had to lean down practically to hide his face in her neck. “I miss another intelligent voice in the crowd, dude.”

Lydia just chuckled. “Awww, are the Hale’s and the puppies killing you?” she asked, pulling back.

Stiles made a face. “Scott tried to talk Isaac into eating dog treats last week to see if it would taste good as a werewolf.”

“Hey!” Scott cried from the living room. “You never know!” he called out.

Isaac rolled his eyes from behind Lydia. “He’s lucky he’s pretty,” he said flatly and Stiles grinned as they heard Scott stumbling over something as he came running to the doorway.

“Hey! I’m not an idiot or something!” he defended.

Peter just followed him to the hall and clapped his shoulder. “Scott, it’s not your fault you’re not the brightest crayon in the box,” he comforted. “Intelligence is a dying breed. Your generation is all slightly dumber.”

Stiles snorted. “You say that like you really ‘count’ as the generation before us. I know your secret,” he said and Peter raised an eyebrow. “You’re like… barely older than Derek. You don’t really count as part of our parents’ generation,” he teased. “Hell, my dad’s old enough to be your dad.”

Isaac raised an eyebrow at Peter. “Wow, you look _old_!”

Peter huffed. “Yeah well, being very ill and then _dead_ doesn’t exactly do wonders for your complexion.” He eyed Stiles. “Speaking of Derek, where is he? You didn’t kill him did you?”

Stiles smirked. “Yep, like a black widow, I’m your alpha now,” he said flatly, earning an eye roll.

“Sarcasm doesn’t suit you,” Peter said flatly.

Stiles snorted. “Lies and slander,” he said, waving a hand. “I don’t know where he is, to answer your question. He was dressed and out the door before me, I thought he’d come downstairs. Must be hiding from Lydia.”

“I’m not hiding!” Derek called from upstairs. “I’m just… doing stuff!”

Stiles rolled his eyes. “Stuff like hiding from Lydia?”

“…. No!” 

Stiles grinned, biting his lip as he rolled his eyes at Lydia. “C’mon, let’s see how bad he freaks out,” he said, tugging her by the hand as they headed upstairs.

~

Stiles was asleep where he’d dozed off against Derek’s side on the couch long after most everybody else had gone home or gone to sleep when he was started awake by pounding on the door. He jerked awake and saw Derek rubbing at his face as he, too, sat up. “The hell?” Derek grumbled and Stiles stood up quickly, instantly on alert.

“Derek?” he asked, and Derek frowned, then shook his head.

“Just Allison…” He trailed off, looking at the clock. “At two in the morning?” he added, frowning.

Stiles followed Derek into the hall just as he saw Isaac and Peter coming down the stairs. Scott was leaning over the rail at the top, looking down. There was more banging at the door and he heard Lydia’s voice this time. “Allison, what is going on?!”

Derek opened the door and Allison shoved past him, glaring daggers around the hall. “Where the hell is Peter?!” she demanded, then spotted him halfway down the stairs. “You!” she hissed, eyes narrowed.

“Allison, why did you drag us here to yell at Peter?!” Lydia asked, wrapped in a coat and wearing bedroom slippers. She looked at Stiles. “I was spending the night with her and out of nowhere she woke me up dragged me out of the house without getting dressed!”

Allison held something up and Stiles saw it was a wallet. “Allison, what-“ She flipped it open and held it out so Stiles could see Peter’s license.

Peter just groaned. “ _Aw crap_.” 

“Why the HELL was your wallet in my living room?! What have you been doing in my apartment?! What are you planning you psychotic bastard?!” she demanded, throwing the wallet at him so that only his werewolf reflexes made him able to duck it. 

Derek tensed and Stiles put a hand on his shoulder. “Peter… how did your wallet get there?” he asked in a warning tone.

Peter rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically. “Give me five minutes,” he said, starting up the stairs.

“No,” Derek said firmly. “You’re not sneaking off until you explain,” he demanded and Allison looked smug.

Peter threw his hands up. “Oh for the love of God-“ He pointed at Scott. “Go get my phone, please.” He crossed his arms over his bare chest, glowering down at the ones below him. “This is so stupid, Derek. It’s not what you think, I’m not ‘going rogue’ or whatever you think.”

Stiles shrugged. “Sorry, dude, but you were sneaking around a hunter’s house-“

“I’m really not,” Peter muttered, then held out his hand when Scott handed him his phone. He dialed a number then held it up to his ear, leaning on the banister. Someone answered and he sighed. “Hey, sorry to wake you up, but your lovely daughter is threatening me because apparently she found my wallet in the living room-“ He stopped and made a face. “Yeah, well, I didn’t exactly want to do this either,” he said with a snap in his tone. He waited, then looked at Allison. “Your father says he wants you to come home so you can have a talk-“

“Prove it,” she challenged and Peter gave her an annoyed look.

He put the phone on speaker and held it out. “Sorry, can you repeat that last one?” he asked.

“Tell Allison this is a conversation for her to have with me and not an audience. I can’t believe she didn’t even bother asking me and ran off to go threaten a werewolf in his pack home. I taught her better than that,” Chris’s voice said.

Peter smirked at the confused look on Allison’s face. “Yes, well, seeing as my pack was happy enough to look at me like I’d gone rogue on them at her accusation with nothing more than a wallet as proof, clearly she wasn’t that misguided,” he said simply. “I believe she and Miss Martin will be returning soon, though,” he added.

Chris chuckled. “Well, I at least expected I would have more than the first night she got home to bring up this particular development with her,” he said, and Stiles suddenly gaped as realization hit him. Derek turned to raise an eyebrow at him, but Stiles was busy flapping his hands and pointing and making faces that made no sense. Peter saw and smirked. “Maybe next time you won’t forget all of your things before you leave, though. Pretty sure I’ve got as many of your clothes in my closet as mine from all the times you forget them.”

Peter grinned evilly when he saw everyone other than Stiles catch on one at a time. Nothing was better than the horrified look on Allison’s face and the nauseated look on Lydia’s. Isaac looked confused, Scott looked like he was still unsure, Stiles holding his mouth shut with his own hands to keep from laughing loudly, and Derek just looked like he was annoyed and should’ve known. Peter chuckled. “So that’s where all my underwear has gone,” he said, delighting in the disgusted faces it got him. “Alright, I’m sure she’ll be back soon. Also, just so you know, you were on speaker just now, Dear,” Peter said, and then hung up before Chris could even get out his horrified cry of ‘PETER!’ in a loud voice.

Stiles finally gave up and actually slid to the floor laughing, holding his stomach as he laughed so hard he was barely breathing. Derek rolled his eyes at Stiles, then glowered at Peter. “Seriosuly?” he asked, and Peter just smirked, cocking his hips as he leaned against the rail.

“But- But Allison’s _dad_?” Scott asked, making a grossed out face.

“Oh God, Oh God it’s so good! I can’t breathe, ahhh!” Stiles squeaked, wiping the tears off his face. “Oh God, that was the grossest but best thing ever, oh my God, Peter, you win at life!” he said, leaning against Derek’s leg as he pointed at Peter. “You’re the winner forever!”

Peter just smirked at Scott and shrugged. “What can I say? A thing for older men seems to be something Stiles and I have in common,” he said innocently.

Lydia opened her mouth, then hummed, tilting her head. “Actually, Mr. Argent is kinda cute,” she said, then shrugged. “Eh, can’t blame him really, sorry,” she said patting Allison’s arm. Allison was kind of stuck staring into space in horror.

Derek just sighed and shook his head, wiggling his leg free of Stiles’s hold as he walked past them all and started upstairs. “I hate you all; I’m going to bed,” he said simply, shaking his head as he walked away from the scene in the hall below. However as he rounded the top of the stairs, he couldn’t help but glance back at his pack and, even with all their quirks and quarrels, think that for the first time in a long time, maybe things would be okay.

He had a mate and a family, and at the moment everything was wonderful.


End file.
